Posted by milly on June 1, 2006, at 9:01:55
In reply to feeling so pathetic..., posted by Karolina on June 1, 2006, at 1:54:09
Karolina,
This isn't pathetic, you are not pathetic and no-one is fed up with you 'going on' Well I'm not anyway!!
You sound like me about 6 months ago, i really felt as if I was having an affair and if being completly emotionally attatched to my T was being unfaithful to hubby then I probably was (however I don't believe that it was just how it felt at the time)
I know exactly the jealousy of his other patients and spent a whole session sobbing because i saw in the signing in book that he had seen someone else in the morning, I didn't even know if that person was male or female all I knew was that they had a realtionship with MY T and I didn't like it.
I think your post was very articulate and maybe you could take it in to show him.
It is really really confusing and painful and difficult and sometimes you wonder if all of that pain and confusion is worth carrying on with, but you have to remember what he has helped you with.
I gave up feeling guilty about my feelings for my T and tried to 'enjoy' them as it was outside of my power to do anything about them, I was very honest and open about them with him especially as my therapy drew to a close as I knew I couldn't live with them as a secret and the only one I could share them with was my T.
I don't know if you will want to hear this but it still hurts, I'm still confused and find myself obsessing about the realtionship and i haven't seen him for 2 months
I make love to hubby and just pray i don't say my T's name! I still buy clothers with the thought of 'will T like this?' which is mad.
You are not alone, keep babbling
milly
poster:milly
thread:651331
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060526/msgs/651399.html