Posted by kerria on March 27, 2006, at 16:28:26
In reply to Re: Left T - still can't find a T:( » kerria, posted by Dinah on March 27, 2006, at 9:19:05
It has nothing to do with tone of voice. There is a horrific history behind the therapy relationship from hell. T was there during a abusive inpatient stay and took the hospital's side against me. So many times T hung up on me and left me in a dangerous position. i never had a certain day and time- i just got squeezed in at a different day and time every week. After therapy i had to sit in the parking lot for hours crying, not wanting to resume my life. i already shared here about so many of the things. The last thing happened when i was so upset because i found that the surgery that was done was entirely unnecessary. It had nothing to do with the pain i have from a nerve disorder. i have a large lump from the laproscopy and i was telling him how bad i felt- that i was pushed into having this major gyn surgery - it left me with a big scar- the dr took out all everything- in case it was the cause of my pain. It wasn't. They were so rude to me in that office- and the surgery was so hard for me- i'm a s.a. and p.a. survivor. As i explained crying
There were people laughing- hospital workers fooling around and disrupting my session. T wouldn't tell them to be quiet. He doesn't even remember why i was crying. He defended the hospital workers. tears. my T never stood up for me, he never cared enough to.
There's a thousand other things- i dissociate and am used to a. relationships - why i stayed so long.
i hurt so much. all inside hurts so much. i hope we can find a caring T soon.It hurts so much when i read here about other people and their Ts . i'm happy for them but feel so hurt that my T could care less about me and what happens to me. i honestly know that he called to upset me more- to say things to deliberately make me feel even more hopeless- reminding me about how hard a time i have in the hospital at that moment was the worst thing he could have said to me. He knows i fall apart because my parts ground to the environment and to people and relationships. He will say things for the purpose of hurting me for no other reason but to hurt me.
we Need a caring , kind T soon.
kerria
poster:kerria
thread:624509
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060325/msgs/625224.html