Posted by kerria on August 27, 2005, at 0:20:28
In reply to Re: Yesterday a part came in therapy:( » kerria, posted by alexandra_k on August 25, 2005, at 20:35:03
Hi Everyone,
Alexandra,
Yes, you're right- T is the 'hub' - the center of communication. It's hard to have me do that because there isn't a central part and communication is so hard.How does your T help you with communication?
i'm not a T and can't imagine what would help. i can't journal without being upset. i think that i'm one of the most hopeless cases :(
It doesn't seem like there's a way.
now even people that know us make comments - they see our separateness - the differences.a teacher stared a stared at me- i had to go back and ask a technical question about work and he looked at me and kept saying over and over "You're so different.- You act so different now. " " i can't believe - you're so different."
It's scary how different my parts are.
my parts are showing:(It's happened at the outdoor club - i think some people know. The leader was asking "How come sometimes you say your name is ___ and sometimes ___?" i don't know what to say, I like it better, that's all. It hurts even being reminded there are parts :( :( :(
At work they also are acting weird- i'm so worried about everything.
My family life is so hard. there isn't real love. i'm worried that h doesn't love me. He uses the fact that i have separate parts to blame me for anything that goes wrong- "a part did it, lost that, forgot that, etc.
everything needs to get more livable, more possible.
Parts are unhappy about where we are . want a different life.
The opposing things parts say make me a bad mom.
:( i love my kids so much and i wish i wasn't like this. i'm younger than them sometimes and it makes them feel terrible - i can imagine.There's no one- no friends IRL that know me.
The separateness is so damaging and i can't hide it anymore. i wish T could help more. we're losing hope.
Everything's going so badly- my paycheck today was $62 for last week. It was a bad week but i can't live like this. They give me crummy jobs because they never know if i'm actually ever coming in. i'm getting so worse.
Everything is failing and no one is happy with me- i do everything wrong- disappoint everyone and i can't help it.
Still. i'm a mom and worry about mey kids. In actuality i'm so much a failutre at everything and i can't get better. i wish they understood that it isn't because i want to be this way.:(
:( kerria
poster:kerria
thread:546039
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050824/msgs/547124.html