Posted by caraher on August 10, 2005, at 14:07:57
In reply to Sigh (long), posted by messadivoce on August 9, 2005, at 22:19:40
As a disclaimer, I don't remember the details of your previous interactions with this T, so please pardon me if I say something spectacularly ignorant.
Look at him as just a person. Has he said or done anything inappropriate here? Perhaps he might have responded to your announcement, but it wasn't news to him so he may have found it unnecessary to say anything. When you emailed him he did reply, albeit tersely. But you said you sent him a chipper email rather than, say, a desperate plea for validation, and he responded accordingly.
So while he's someone you naturally have more emotional investment in than, say, your dentist or postal carrier, on another level he's just another person who has performed a service for you. Look at all the friends and relatives who *did* reply to you and are happy for you. Remember your fiance, who is making the ultimate commitment to you. To the degree that you can, forgive your T's failure to respond in the way that you'd like and realize that, as others have said, you do not need to rely on his validation for your own personal worth.
And now that I've played the bad guy, let me add that I'm so sorry that this is getting you down and that I know the feeling of being overlooked by someone you want to pay more attention to you. Just don't mistake the hurt with your value as a human being!
poster:caraher
thread:539832
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050801/msgs/539954.html