Posted by daisym on June 24, 2005, at 0:13:21
In reply to Very frustrated with therapy, posted by crushedout on June 23, 2005, at 21:51:36
Hey crushed, nice to see you. I'm sorry you are so frustrated.
I think one of the important things about therapy is that we have carved out space to talk about things and think things through outloud. Being encouraged and allowed to be self-reflective in this space allows for our own insights into what and why we do things. Perhaps your therapist is providing this space, and providing some quiet strength and support for you to look into yourself.
I too complain about going over and over the same stuff. This is when I usually get the "therapy is like a spiral" speech. He tells me we go over and over stuff to look at it in new ways and to understand things in different lights. He says everytime I tell him the story he hears it new, he gets something else out of it. And he does ask the same questions a lot, but I think this is his training, those standard questions that slow me down and make me think.
The most frustrating thing about therapy, for me, is that he doesn't have the answers. He tells me his crystal ball is broken and his magic wand is in the shop. I want to get from point A to point B and I want a map and land marks. He wants to analyze my choice of transportation!
I guess you have to ask yourself what your goals are and if you feel better or worse. You sound better. I also think that maybe (totally guessing here) that you must still be so gun-shy about building a deep connection with her. Perhaps this is getting in the way a little bit.
My favorite way to handle people who forget things is to say, "Like I told you before, I blah, blah, blah..." I think you were brave to tell her you didn't follow her today. I hope she rephrased things for you.
Keep working on it. It will come together. I like Dinah's suggestion about focusing on her strengths. Maybe you could actually ask her what she things her strongest asset as a therapist is. It might give you insight to why she does certain things a certain way. Equally, you could ask her what she thinks her weakness is. See if she is self-aware. It is a kind way of opening a conversation to your frustrations.
Good luck!
poster:daisym
thread:517766
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050622/msgs/517859.html