Posted by daisym on March 9, 2005, at 19:45:14
In reply to Re: Going to the scene of the crime . . . » TamaraJ, posted by Aphrodite on March 9, 2005, at 19:06:50
I think his offer is really generous and amazing. If I can I'd like to offer a few thoughts on the other side...just to make sure you think this through.
There is safety in your therapist's office and while we project our feelings and fantasies on them as we relive the memories with them, it is still a very clear frame within which to work. By becoming part of the memories, will this lessen the safety you feel with him? Will his presence somehow become threatening? If, in real life, you wish to cry, or hide or be comforted, can he do that without crossing the boundaries into your "real" life? Therapy is already such a confusing endeavor, wanting to be taken care of, wanting to take care of them, wanting all of it to never have happened.
Given your recent response with seeing him out in the real world, how will it feel to drive there and back with him? Will it all be therapy? Will you make small talk?
Please don't misunderstand. I'm completely in favor of unique supports that facilitate healing or break throughs. But I'm not sure you've done enough work on the intensity of all of this (look at how you reacted) to not have this be harmful instead of helpful. You MUST guard against being retraumatized.
I think it is pretty normal to reach the conclusion that your therapist doesn't believe you, or that you don't believe you. Sometimes we become so unsure of ourselves because it is all so overwhelming and unbelievable. I'm glad he figured out what to say so that you could reconnect.
Whatever you decide, the offer itself is amazing and something to be cherished.
poster:daisym
thread:468771
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050305/msgs/468931.html