Posted by fallsfall on January 9, 2005, at 14:19:15
In reply to See, here's the thing (trigger, I guess), posted by Dinah on January 9, 2005, at 12:37:35
You sound very angry. Allow yourself your anger. It is there for a reason.
>Nobody cares how you feel as long as you're good and don't cause trouble.
**I** care how you feel whether your behavior is good or bad and whether or not you are causing trouble. Therefore, your statement is not true - because *somebody* (me) cares. You could say "The bosses at my company don't care...".
The way that they are hurting you is obviously very, very painful for you. Can you identify *what* it is about this particular hurting that produces so much pain?
It is never true that you have no choices. And you are proposing one of the choices you have: to accept their hurt and turn it onto yourself. But there ARE other choices available to you. It may be hard to identify the other choices, or you may not think that they are possible. But there ARE other possible choices. I would help you try to identify some.
When I want to hurt myself in retalliation for someone hurting me, I am usually feeling like I have no control. That I am entirely at their mercy. So they are hurting me, but I have no way to even let them know that. Is this close to how you are feeling?
Let's see if we can figure out some way for you to express your anger that sends some communication to those who are hurting you.
(((Dinah)))
poster:fallsfall
thread:439740
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050105/msgs/439767.html