Posted by daisym on January 7, 2005, at 0:31:17
In reply to i am having such a bad night..., posted by rainbowbrite on January 6, 2005, at 22:02:31
I'm sorry you are struggling. I tend to think of the 24 hours after an intense session as a "therapy hang-over." For me it is an intense period of longing, usually for the connection I feel when I'm in a session. My therapist thinks I feel it so accutely after a powerful session because he feels there is a merging of selves that takes place between us but we have to separate at the end so I can leave. I feel so empty at those times. He always helps me figure out ways to take him with me, but it still hurts.
I think it is natural to question your therapist's abilities when you leave feeling bad. It is counter-intuitive to subject yourself to pain, even if some part of you knows you need to go through it to feel better. I'm not sure what you mean by awkwardness...does she seem unable to handle your tears or your anger? Your therapist should help guide you and keep you safe as you explore your own thoughts and feelings. I guess it also depends on their orientation. If she is constantly correcting negative thoughts and that seems to shut you down, she may have a philosophy that doesn't believe in exploring the past but rather in dealing with your current beliefs and feelings as they relate to your life now.
I'm not sure I'm being helpful at all as I write this. I guess I just want to share that therapy can and often does feel awful, but it isn't therapy that is causing the pain, but rather is allowing you to feel it fully. (My therapist would be shocked to see me write that.)
I hope you feel better soon.
poster:daisym
thread:438600
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050105/msgs/438855.html