Posted by Dinah on August 29, 2004, at 9:02:21
In reply to Re: First Session Back, posted by Dinah on August 29, 2004, at 8:23:55
It can't possibly be the reduction to once a week itself that is frightening. He's not nearly so busy that he couldn't add my second session back.
So it can't be that I'm afraid that I can't get by on seeing him once a week. I must be afraid that I can.
If I'm actually afraid of needing him less, then "needing him" must serve some purpose or have some value quite apart from "him". So if I can ascertain the value of "needing" separate from the value of "him", I should be able to address the issue more effectively.
If I separate the value my therapist provides, what is the value of *needing my therapist*? That is the question. And one that has no answer obvious to me. Does anyone have any ideas?
The only thing that springs to mind at all is that part of me is adamantly opposed to "growing up". No specificity there. The entire idea agitates me so much that there is never any rational explanation of the fear. Is it possible that *needing my therapist* is part of not growing up and admitting to a decrease in the need would activate the fear of growing up? Could that be why I'm clinging to the need separately from clinging to my therapist? And if so, how can that be addressed?
poster:Dinah
thread:382174
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040828/msgs/383602.html