Posted by Racer on August 26, 2004, at 2:13:35
In reply to Re: Disregarding T Advice..., posted by alexandra_k on August 25, 2004, at 22:51:44
(Warning -- very sleep deprived right now...)
This sounds so simple, yet it's so difficult somehow to get myself around it -- but here it is: "If you didn't have that *need* to waffle over these things in therapy over and over -- you probably wouldn't feel the need to *be* in therapy in the first place." (Check it out, Dinah, if you read this: I managed to say it SHORT! I'm learnin' from your example.)
Honestly, yes, I know that I do it consistently enough to have agonized over it -- and I've talked to enough people about it that I now kinda *know* that it's -- shall we say -- not uncommon.
Personally, I think Alexandra_k has the right track with "sometimes just knowing you have a choice is enough." The two examples you've brought up between you -- job change and change of living situation -- are on the list of the top five life stressors. Even if it ever looks simple enough to you -- give yourself permission to be human for actively trying to avoid living through such complex and stressful experiences. (Trust me -- I know how hard this is.)
In college, one of my buddies used to have this rant about "After The Age Of 10, You Will Never Again Decisively Win Any Argument" because after about that age, there is too much background noise from things like experience, maturity in the brain, sex drive locking in, and so on. I think I believe that the key is most of us eventually learn to turn down the volume on that background noise, a lot of the petty stuff doesn't seem so vital anymore, and -- honestly -- most of us have had enough of those truly weird experiences where we have kinda figured out that you get all the information you can find, you balance it out in the good and bad columns -- and then you flip a coin. The results are just about as likely to be accurate in predictive power.
On the other hand, I'm a psychiatric patient -- what do I know about any of this?
;-)
poster:Racer
thread:382392
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040821/msgs/382437.html