Posted by Joslynn on July 28, 2004, at 9:16:08
In reply to Re: Hi everyone, posted by lucy stone on July 27, 2004, at 21:47:05
Warning: Jadah, don't read this post if you are feeling sensitive. It is a tough love thing.
I agree with Lucy Stone on this one. Sorry Jadah, but I think what he is doing is reprehensible. He is hurting you, his profession and his wife. Just because it feels good to you now doesn't mean that what he is doing is right.
When I come to a male therapist revealing my childhood hurts, in many ways I become a child emotionally, even though I have a woman's body. For the therapist to have sex with that body would be, to me, the same thing as taking advantage of a child. I am not alone in this theory of why it is wrong, it's in all the literature.
I am not saying you did anything wrong. I think that he is the one who is wrong. You came to him with sexual abuse history and I feel that he consciously or subconscioulsy took advantage of that. He may "seem" sensitive, but I don't think someone who cheats on his wife with a vulnerable patient--who is also paying him no less--is a sensitive person. Sorry I just don't.
I thought he was supposed to help the emotional child grow up into an emotional adult so that you could find a loving relationship with an available person. Not keep you emeshed with him.
I hope this post doesn't make you feel worse, but I think this situation is very dangerous and will hurt you in the end. Can you at least get the names of other therapists or support groups, so you have them as backups when this unravels?
P.S. I very much appreciate your honesty in this. I know it has helped me immensely in my own transference issues, to see the dangers of crossing the line.
poster:Joslynn
thread:267681
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040728/msgs/371576.html