Posted by 1980Monroe on April 25, 2004, at 12:58:45
In reply to Re: Growing up in isolation really messed me up, posted by Racer on April 25, 2004, at 9:15:04
Hey Racer,
Sorry i didnt respond to your other posts, i had alot of term papers to catch up on, but i did enjoy reading them, i got better advice from a message board than my own therapist Dr. Moody, he sometimes just sound like he had common sense at times. I wrote this one to go more into detail about my problem which i couldnt explain in many of the previous ones.Ok, about medications,, been on almost every benzodiazepine there is in the U.S, from klonoplin, xanax, serax, and librium, havent taken valium but doubt its any diffrent from the rest of them. Was on paxil, and trazadone, but those were too sedating, and acutally made me feel more withdrawn. Ive even been put on Amytal, an old barbiturate, when nothing worked and that failed too. In concluesion, anxiety have no connection with the problem, i still can be calm but feel uncomfortable.
THe only thing that in my personal opnion that somewhat treats the symptoms, is desoxyn which I take for adhd. Its methamphetamine, i have adhd moderatly bad, someitmes i cant concentrate on what someone is talking about and am always zoning out! Cocaine was directly effective, i felt like a completely new, confident, sometimes egotistical person, wasnt afraid to speak up, and i could talk completly confidently with out studering, but still in the long run causes problems in itself, i terminating usage after a short trial. I do take Wellbutrin 300XL also becuase its also a stimulating anti-depressant.
Acually my hobby in my free time is studying the mechanism of actions in these medications, like amphetamine, cocaine, they increase the amount of dopamine which is an exitory pleasure chemical in the nerve synapse, Wellbutrin also increases dopamine levels this but defiently to lower level, thats why i got myself put on it. I also reseached supplements that i self medicate with, such as L-Tyrosine, and DL-Phenylanine, which both are converted to dopamine in the body. I could probly write a long article about nuerotransmisstion in the nerve synpase if i wanted. But drugs only treat symptoms, they make it feel better but its quick fix. I think my problem now that i think of it, is confidence, adapting to the enviorment is also some part of it, but confidence is about 50-70% of the problem. Thats why cocaine worked so well, that rush of feeling invincible, people actually seemed intimidated by me at times, never before felt that great feeling. Maybe i need to start with that. Well thanks for your advice racer, your really give encouraging posts.
poster:1980Monroe
thread:339751
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040419/msgs/339855.html