Posted by fallsfall on April 17, 2004, at 22:02:02
In reply to the inconsistent therapist « paltiel, posted by Dr. Bob on April 17, 2004, at 11:02:41
Your question makes me think of Kohut's phrase "optimal frustrations". Therapists are going to make mistakes, for any number of reasons. They are human, and humans make mistakes (except for me, of course). These mistakes and how they recover from them, and how we survive them are part of what makes therapy a learning experience. Parents make mistakes, too - and it is in learning to deal with our parents' mistakes that we learn to handle things on our own. Therapist's mistakes help us in the same way.
Now, the phrase does have the word "optimal" in it. If there are too many frustrations, then it can be too stressful. If there are too few, then you don't learn anything.
I think that it is important when a therapist makes a mistake that they ackowledge their mistake. I know that I am very perfectionistic, so it is important for my learning to see my therapist model making a mistake and surviving it.
You asked about "inconsistency", and I talked about mistakes. I pretty much see them as the same thing. If you see them differently, I would be interested to know how you think they are different.
poster:fallsfall
thread:337151
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040409/msgs/337289.html