Posted by Pandabear on April 6, 2004, at 18:38:59
I know that I tend to have a variety of issues to talk about on this website but, I seriously need advice..I hope no one minds. My issue is that I cannot seem to open up all the way with my therapist. It has nothing to do with her or the way she is helping me...it is all me. I feel as if Im afraid to be emotional. I have gotten emotional in front of her..but lately its like I spend a lot of time outside of therapy depressed and crying but when I am sitting in front of her, I cannot get emotional. She can tell though that I am about to get upset and so she will say something in regards to my feelings and then watch me to see if it strikes anything in me. Yet, all I can do is smile back at her. I need sooo much to be able to cry in front of her because I need to let go of what is bothering me but I cannot. It annoys me to know end. NO i dont want to be upset..but therapy is the place where you should be able to let it all out..and I cant.. yet If she saw me away from her office she would know how upset and worked up Im getting over things. Im doing pretty well right now but I want to be able to relax and show my feelings but I cant.. I know that she probably already knows that I am upset about things but I would like to be able to show her how upset I am..When I met with her and my pdoc I wanted so badly to break down and cry but for some reason I did not want my pdoc to see me upset....any suggestions or thoughts? does anyone else have this problem? Its so embarressing for me because I am an emotional person I just dont like showing it in front of people..yet I need to be able to do so with her...you know?? I have even come into her office in tears begging her to work me in to see me and yet when Im in her office...I cannot show that same emotion..even though I truly am upset..
Any words of wisdom would be great! Thanks...
poster:Pandabear
thread:333439
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040402/msgs/333439.html