Posted by bell_75 on March 23, 2004, at 3:34:16
In reply to Re: Crying in your T's office » mair, posted by Dinah on March 22, 2004, at 18:45:50
My T is very welcoming and patient when it comes to me crying I just wish I could feel the same. I often wonder if he had therapy when he was young (he once disclosed he was a suicidal teen) and so i wonder if he knows what its like to cry in front of your therapist. I feel so completely exposed and just...naked. All my security has gone and i just knooow i look terrible, cause I feel it. What really touches me is if i can notice his eyes a little watery...its hard to tell tho because he wears glasses and i dont want to make it obvious that im looking closely.
He offers me tissues and sits there *watching* me which is what puts me off. I know hes not purposely watching me cry hes just allowing me to let it out and waiting till i feel ready to talk again. I admire the patience therapists have with their clients...i usually recovery quickly but i wonder if he'd let me cry and cry for along time.
I often put myself down about it too..i say stuff like "aah im sorry I'm such a cry baby" and that i hate crying. He tells me its good though and that hes glad i do because it shows i can express my emotions and its part of the healing and 'grieving' for things i've lost.
No matter what he says i still feel like hell when i do it and i cant just embrace the fact that its just a way of expressing my sadness, i feel so vulnerable. I'm just glad hes trained to be so understanding and supportive. If he said
"oh stop that!" then I'd be worried...and probably cry more but in a bad way lol
Dont worry if you dont tho...its something thats gotta come when its ready. You'll know when you need to and when you do it'll be a relief.
~Bell
poster:bell_75
thread:327118
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040321/msgs/327286.html