Posted by All Done on March 19, 2004, at 15:01:24
In reply to Re: A little better » deirdrehbrt, posted by fallsfall on March 19, 2004, at 13:53:31
Falls,
I'm sorry you had a string of tough sessions, but I'm glad you had this one that wasn't so bad. Sometimes it takes those few good or decent sessions to keep us motivated to keep coming back and trying, huh?
In one of your posts you said, "It does seem interesting that it is not so much that I am afraid of expressing anger - but I am afraid of FEELING anger. Maybe if I start feeling it, then I'll have to deal with the expressing it part. It almost seems like the fear is about *being* angry - that *being* angry is a "bad" thing." I am the exact same way. I very rarely express anger, but (at least as of right now) I think that is because I *feel* angry even less often. My T has told me there might be times I'm angry at him and he would like for us to talk about it. Well, the two times I have expressed anger towards him, it was only because logic told me that there was something I should be mad about. So, I called him on it. I truly don't think I *felt* angry, I just thought I should be angry. Is he trying to teach me to feel anger? How does one go about learning to feel an emotion?
And the two times I was "angry" with him, I was in the same situation as you. I only confronted him because I was very confident about what I was saying. But even then, we only talked briefly before I crawled back into my shell.
I'm not sure why I don't feel anger, but I think it has to do with the fact that my mom was the only one in the house allowed to be angry. My sisters (and occasionally my dad) would get mad at her and it would only result in an argument no one could win except for my mom. So, why bother, I guess?
Sorry. This probably didn't help you sort anything out, but, at least for me, it's kind of comforting knowing there are others in the same boat. So, thanks. I appreciated reading your thoughts and experiences :).
Take care,
All Done
poster:All Done
thread:325785
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040313/msgs/326113.html