Posted by Miss Honeychurch on January 29, 2004, at 8:42:57
In reply to Transference and SOs - Miss Honeychurch, posted by All Done on January 28, 2004, at 12:35:32
Luckily my husband is definitely not the jealous type, so I think a lot of my guilt over my relationship with my T is all self-inflicted.
I was pretty worried when I started therapy since my T said that when one spouse starts getting therapy, often times, the marriage becomes troubled, simply for the fact that the relationship may have been dependent on the behavior/anxiety/depression of the other. And once yu start working these out in therapy and becoming healthier mentally, many times the marriage falls apart. I was having marital problems when I first started seeing Bean (my T) and was convinced I was going to get divorced. Bean also suggested marital counseling. I said no, that I wanted to figure out what was going on with me first.
However, since I've been in therapy for 6 months now, my marriage is 10 times as strong as it ever was. Therapy, and my the therapeutic intimate relationship, has made me happier and my marriage wonderful. My husband says he likes me so much better since I've been in therapy. This therefore lessens my guilt about my transference. I talk about therapy with my husband sometimes, but I do tell my T things I would never tell my husband. Again, I used to feel guilty about the transference and the daddy crush and all that, but it has quite possibly saved my marriage. I think my husband would hug Bean if he ever met him!
poster:Miss Honeychurch
thread:306461
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040123/msgs/306818.html