Posted by Karen_kay on January 28, 2004, at 18:16:48
In reply to Re: Transference and SOs » Dinah, posted by All Done on January 28, 2004, at 13:32:25
Oh....Oh....Oh... My boyfriend can't stand Bubba. He met him once and liked him then, but overheard a telephone conversation with my sister where I said something about humping Bubba, and my boyfriend snarls everytime I mention him. I mentioned the situation to Bubba, and he said, "Well, shouldn't you be more careful about making comments like that in front of your boyfriend?" At least he didn't tell me to stop making comments like that all together :)
It's even worse for me, because my therapist almost convinces me to leave my boyfriend. I'm not happy, but I do love him. I'm just not sure where the problem is. Is it with me, or my boyfriend? And it isn't that he tells me to leave my boyfriend, but he thinks I should. I keep telling him, "Well, if your brother weren't married, I may think about it." I'm just confused as to whether or not things would work with my boyfriend and we've been together for 5 years. And I'm convinced the problem's mine....Yeah, if there's a contest, Bubba wins, hands down.. Unless I'm mad at him, then my boyfriend wins. But I'm not mad at Bubba often.
As for the intimacy... Well, remember that Beefcake is there soley for you. There's almost no compromise involved. So it's hard to say if that's a realistic interpretation of a "real" emotional realationship within a marriage or relationship with a SO, you know?? I mean the other person (the therapist) doesn't have to worry about getting his feelings hurt, as he only sees you for an hour a week or maybe twice a week. Oh goodness, I hope that it is possible in the "real world" but a relationship where someone isn't overly sensitive or too worried about getting their own feelings hurt??? Now that's unheard of!
But, on the upside, since therapy, I've learned that I can trust men. So, even if things don't work out in this relationship, maybe in the next 2 or 3 hundred :) I'll be able to trust men and be more open with my feelings and emotions. Maybe I'll be the typical female in the relationship and my old man will be the typical man?? Maybe not though! I do like those drama queens :)
poster:Karen_kay
thread:306461
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040123/msgs/306591.html