Posted by Dinah on December 18, 2003, at 6:43:44
In reply to Ready to Throw in the Towel, posted by tabitha on December 17, 2003, at 23:18:21
Tabitha, I'm not going to say you should throw in the towel. It might be worth sticking it out for a while yet.
You don't like one woman out of how many? And she doesn't like you? I think that's ok. I think that's a great percent, however many are in the group. Not everyone is going to like you (gasp!). Their loss. :)
I would let your therapist know how you felt about the emotionally expressive part. While it may be true that you are out of touch with your feelings, and need to work on that, it may also be not true. It certainly doesn't seem true here.
And there is this huge pressure in our society to be cookie cutter one way correct. We should be outgoing. We should be expressive. We should wear this and believe that. There is a huge bias against introverts. If you are a happily reserved and introverted person, who manages to get your social needs met in the real world, it's rude of other people, therapist included, to suggest that you need to change to fit a mold that suits them better. If you aren't happily reserved and introverted, if your social needs aren't being met sufficiently, you might want to consider changing your style just enough that you are able to get what you need, without for one minute sacrificing who you are or what you like about yourself.
I still wonder if there isn't some conflict of interest in running a group with individual patients involved. I don't think I'd ever go to a group run by my therapist. I'm also pretty certain he'd never invite me. :D
I suspect I'd be spittin' mad at my therapist over the goal of group comment, and would (as he puts it) bite back. But maybe my style isn't the best one for getting my goals met.
Can you make a list of what *you* want your goals to be before therapy? Maybe you could go over them with your therapist, refine them, and keep them on hand for the next such occurance. Maybe one of them could be "learning to get along with difficult people" or "learning to interact with emotionally expressive people in a way that feels right to me".
It might at least be worth a shot....
Or maybe not, if it truly hasn't proved to be a valuable experience to you. Only you can judge that...
poster:Dinah
thread:291162
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031213/msgs/291211.html