Posted by Dinah on July 20, 2005, at 5:40:50 [reposted on July 24, 2005, at 9:56:13 | original URL]
In reply to I'm sorry Dinah (nm), posted by Bobby on July 20, 2005, at 1:04:30
It was rough because it was such a surprise. And came at a time when I was pretty so low that I don't think I could feel much more depressed. In the common sense of the word not the clinical sense. I didn't sleep well last night for the leaden weight in my belly.
It was also rough because of the proximity of the two deaths. As logical as I try to be, I sort of feel like the angel of death when that happens, and it's happened twice now in less than a year.
I was checking my third old dogs breathing all night, even though everyone says she's as healthy as a horse. I checked my husband's breathing a few times too.
But logically I know this was best for her. She was in significant pain from the arthritis for a few months, and couldn't take the more effective drugs. From time to time I wondered if I was doing her a service. But she still enjoyed getting attention, and still got as happy as could be at a doggy treat. Now she's out of pain, and died so peacefully right at the feet of her favorite person at the ripe old age of thirteen. Not that thirteen is old for my little dogs. But she was a medium size dog with a long coat. I understand it's older for them. What a lucky dog. Well, as lucky as a chronically anxious and neurotic dog can be. (Wonder why we got on so well?)
I'm going to have quite a crowd waiting for me in doggy heaven.
But here, I went from having six to having four in the space of a week. Why, I think we're down to normal in the dog area. For the first time since I was a teen.
poster:Dinah
thread:532644
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20041230/msgs/532653.html