Posted by ElaineM on November 22, 2006, at 21:37:21
In reply to Re: Anyone scared when losing weight?, posted by Racer on November 21, 2006, at 18:26:52
>>>>>but at the start of each episode, when I knew my weight was getting towards my danger zone, I would get excited and start working to lose more.
No, that does happen too. The fear and the sadness come in at the beginning, and then right at the end while I'm waiting to get into treatment. Dropping past an old plateau (during the middle, or late-middle of a relapse) is usually....pleasing (for lack of a better word) THough there was always lingering fear -- I guess "a knowing" of the havoc that my ED puts my body through.
>>>>People don't seem to get it, you know?
Completely. I guess you can relate to how hard it was for me to have my T suggest weight-loss to me.
>>>>>Episodes have never been triggered by voluntary dieting for me, they've always started when I've lost weight for other reasons -- and then keep going.
See, it's always been a result of dieting for me. THis is the first time I've ever lost weight from being ill. Though this is also the first time I've ever been this immediately sick before. With the AN it was more like permanent after-effects. I just get so terribly upset cause I've never lost weight involuntarily before. It's soooo scary. There's nothing good-feeling about it. It's kind of a disorienting feeling to be as scared as I am of what's happening now. It's a different kind of fear then AN relapses. I guess just cause it's completely out of my control right now. T is a bit concerned, which is just confusing the sh*t out of me right now. But I guess he wanted the weight to come off through dieting and exercise, and now he see's how poor my health is. I rarely make it to T now anyways. He hates that too.
>>>>>Have you tried telling your doctor that you're worried about your weight loss, AND worried that he'll think it's AN rather than something "real?"
No, I haven't said both things at once. I just got the gutts to mention the weight loss to my specialist and he kinda rolled his eyes. I kinda expected that though cause he had in my file that I was anorexic before (and all my stats). I want to be respected and trusted by docs (well, by everyone, but especially docs now that I'm desperate to get help) so much.
I have an appointment with "Full-Disclosure Doc" on Friday. I'll try and plan what to say. I've gotta try. I don't have any other options really.
I'll let you know how it goes.
Thanks for input. It's nice to know I'm not crazy.
Blove, EL
poster:ElaineM
thread:705834
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/eating/20060628/msgs/706354.html