Posted by DinahM on April 23, 2002, at 10:30:03
In reply to Re: On Being Blocked, and Walking On Eggs » Dr. Bob, posted by trouble on April 23, 2002, at 6:56:28
> Dr. Bob,
>
> steppin lightly, thinner shells, people jumping at their own shadows, we need to indulge this for people's own good? I don't get that. Sounds more like colluding w/ arrested development, and enabling passive aggressive behaviors.
>
> grow up.
>
I'm going to respond to this because I am a flippin' idiot. And because I have very little left to lose. And of all the posts on this thread I'm responding to your post, trouble, because I like you. And because I know I like you, I know this response isn't affected by personal feelings. It's just a reflection on the topic.I'm a person with a paper thin shell, I guess. And speaking for myself only, I've got to admit: It ain't gonna happen. I'm not going to grow up. All my life I've been told to toughen up. "Don't cry when they tease you Dinah. Don't let them know they get to you. No one else cries Dinah. That's why they choose you. Just laugh it off Dinah. Everyone else just laughs it off. Why can't you?" And God himself knows I tried, although I don't suppose anyone else does. Because no matter how hard I tried, I cried. I guess I have no sense of humor. I hate practical jokes and "caught on video." I don't understand how embarassing someone can be funny. And I strongly suspect it's genetic, because I see the same thing in my son. I worry for him, because it makes life pretty hard.
Anyway, I'm not going to speak for any other thinned skinned person but myself. But I know that I make things difficult for others. And I know that I put a damper on things sometimes. My traditional response has been to withdraw from society and have only the most superficial interactions with others. I was led to believe that was wrong. But in my heart I know it's right. Not only because I don't want to make others uncomfortable, but also because it hurts to know that I make others uncomfortable. It's a lot easier to just avoid that hurt. And it has the advantage of allowing others not to feel that they need to walk on eggshells. (And yes, you are walking on eggshells. Whole eggs do have eggshells. They just are whole eggshells which still contain an egg.) But this particular eggshell was broken long ago. Not fit for display. Remove to the back of the store.
poster:DinahM
thread:4374
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020420/msgs/4432.html