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Re: On Being Blocked, and Walking On Eggs

Posted by Dr. Bob on April 23, 2002, at 2:23:16

In reply to On Being Blocked, and Walking On Eggs, posted by Zo on April 22, 2002, at 19:55:01

> Sooooo. I'd like to know the rules.
>
> If I have been blocked for one week, will the next PBC result in a two-week block?

In general, yes. But if a long time goes by, maybe not. Sorry if that's kind of vague. But at least I did as suggested and added a section to the FAQ:

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#enforce

> I am given to understand that to get a PBC, and therefore earn a block, is wholly random! It's whatever catches the eye of the admin! So it means nothing about you!

I'm not sure I agree with that. It's not like I flip a coin each time. I do try to use some judgment and to be as consistent as I can.

> Isn't there a better way to structure things? EVERYONE fears being themselves. If people make a misstep in that direction, does it really teach anybody anything to "disappear" them from the community?
>
> It seems perilously close to Patriarchal Thinking: You screw up, I punish you. End of story.
>
> And that makes me verrrry nervous. I didn't raise my kids that way--I raised them in the context that there is always a solution, and it is arrived at by mutuality, by communication, by inclusiveness, not exclusion.

If there's a better way, let me know...

It's not just about the person who gets blocked. It's also about keeping it a safe, welcoming community for others.

I'm all for inclusiveness. But it has its limits. And the more sensitive people are (the thinner their shells), the more restrictive the limits may need to be...

> If a rule and/or the manner in which it is applied results e in even the tiniest increase in the climate of fear---fear as opposed to safety, fear as opposed to belonging and acceptance--then that rule and those methods need reexamination.

It never hurts to reexamine, but what if one person, out of fear, restrains himself or herself and as a result another person feels -- or a number of other people feel -- safer?

Bob


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20020420/msgs/4398.html