Posted by maxime on October 31, 2010, at 14:18:54
In reply to Re: Thinking of coming off meds NO WAY!, posted by morgan miller on October 31, 2010, at 0:40:04
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> So why are you sad to be on meds if you were doing so badly off them? If you can find meds that work and don't cause weight gain or other unwanted side effects, you'll be doing o.k. Your psychiatrist is still for medication, he's a psychiatrist. I totally understand why he wants you to stay on the medications you are on now, with the exception of Nortriptyline. Severe depression will cause way more damage and interference than most medications will.Because I am taking more meds that I can fit into my hands and I sitll feel like sh*t. I still cry in the bathroom at work. I cry at night. My body hurts everywhere and I can't miss any work. Why do I want to keep put putting these chemicals in me? Sure, I am doing better on them that off them but I am not doing that great. And the side effects. It seems like I will never get rid of the side effects unless I take another med which will no doubt cause more side effects and so on.
To be honest Morgan ... I WANT TO DIE. That is what all this b*llsh*t sums up to. I want to die. And not the type of dying where you wake up in some hospital room. The kind where they have a funeral for you.
Then Phillipa will make a post saying how I well I seem etc. Anyone can seem well over the net. Anyone can seem unwell. I am the latter and I am not lying. It's how I feel and felt for a long time.
Bipolar Type 2, ED-NOS, Self-hatred
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Being happy doesn´t mean the pain is gone. you just bury it deeper.
poster:maxime
thread:965683
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20101030/msgs/967805.html