Posted by maya3 on July 27, 2010, at 14:34:15
In reply to Re: sound familiar? » maya3, posted by violette on July 27, 2010, at 9:15:20
Hi Violette,
> May I ask how the diagnosis only recently came to light despite being in therapy for years?
For some reason my condition was mistaken for personality disorders, which I believe I still suffer from. It is possble that a psychotic break several years ago enabled them to see what I had suspected and succeeded in hiding well for many years. Previous attempts to explain or understand my psychotic symptoms resulted in sarcastic remarks on their part about my "wanting to be schizophrenic" (!)
> People with schitzophrenia benefit from therapy and people with bipolar do as well. How does having a dx of schizoaffective disorder affect your prognosis? Maya-surely this therapist meant s/he personally could not provide therapy to benefit you-rather than in general?Actually, there was one T who told me several years ago that there was no point in my seeing him and that I need to go to rehab instead. I was confused and upset, after a suicide attempt induced by psychotic depression and needed to clear up things that had pushed me over the edge, but the T probably wanted to spare himself from dealing with the likes of me. The rehab center, by the way, has a waiting list and I am still waiting, over four years later.
Now I made an attempt to go to another T but understood that I am somehow written off as someone who constantly switches Ts (which is true), is not serious about therapy and should be treated with medication alone. A hot potato. What they don't understand is that there are obsessions I suffer from which might clear up if I get a chance to discuss them, but the fear of being ridiculed and shamed prevents me from addressing them. The difficulty in discussing things results in my "beating around the bush" and their probable conclusion is that I keep repeating the same nonsense, not making necessary changes and wasting time.
True, I tend to suffer from delusions, but not having a chance to discuss them and make sense of what is happening simply makes it worse.
I am aware of my faults and problematic personality and had really intended to deal with the problem this time, but the way things are going I will not get a chance.
Sorry about this rant, I simply couldn't help it.
poster:maya3
thread:955138
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20100720/msgs/956125.html