Posted by ceres on August 15, 2009, at 6:56:23
In reply to a sign, posted by Maxime on August 11, 2009, at 18:26:20
Maxime, Can you kill the pills, exert yourself stomping on them & then flush the remains?
I'm in that sad place too, desiring an end & don't have any sincere thoughts about hope now. In your case, having gotten so far in school & perhaps having dependents, I hope you decide to make it through each day & that a positive change is ahead.
Pills are not a good option. Long ago, I vomited an overdose & felt sick & defeated. I figured out how that failed, but would not opt for pills again. I have vague memories of reading Madame Bovary & her toxic brew suicide is some aversion.
If somehow, one were discovered & rushed to the ER, there's no guarantee about the state of one's organs or possible brain damage. Plus there's more trauma, as EMT's & ER doctors are not often nice to people who've caused their own bodily destruction.And I remind myself that it's too much long-term trauma for my family & friends and anyone who will make the discovery.
Plus, if we commit suicide, it lowers the threshold for suicides within our families. In my case, someone beat me to it & another such might push a vulnerable member over the edge.And, despite the above rants, I spend a lot of time changing & refining plans, trying to find a lower impact death.
Maybe thinking of a better way to go might relieve your mind a bit, but you can put off acting on it?
I hope you keep going & that the pain eases.
poster:ceres
thread:911201
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090810/msgs/912220.html