Posted by jealibeanz on April 15, 2007, at 21:17:51
In reply to Re: I'm torn. » jealibeanz, posted by KayeBaby on April 15, 2007, at 19:41:04
> JB,
> I would go in and see him again and tell exactly what you just wrote in this post. It is respectful of him and sums up your attitude (which is one of a person who is not an abuser, who is sufferring, and is sufferring more than is probably necessary) Really, this post makes the issue crystal clear. Give this info to the DR. and you will know exactly where you stand with him and then you can know how best to proceed.
>
> You need some anxiety relief and I sense that more than being attached to specific drug you would like to know that he truly understands your situation and has some compassion for it.
>
> I am not sure that he is fully aware of your predicament.
>
> To be fair to him you need tell him exactly how you feel, your fears etc. and give him the opportunity to help you better. IMO this is the right thing to do and what he does with this info is his business.
>
> I know this is easier said than done. Just do what you think is right, JB. That way it will be alright either way.
>
> I am rooting for you!
>
> Peace,
> Kaye
>
>
> > I don't know what I'll end up doing. It probably is a better decision to go back to see my doctor, if only for one last time. At least that would bring a little closure to my medical merry-go-round, instead of giving up by myself.
> >
> > Of course I will once again tell him that my medication is not helping, but from there I don't know what I will do.
> >
> > I could ask for my old regime back... which would come with a sense of desperation, distress, pain, and sadness... while questioning his authority and decisions by clearly requesting something that has been turned down twice.
> >
> > I could ask to go off the medication, without going on another, because it isn't helping. There's no need to prolong this ineffective treatment. It's almost demeaning for me to continue with it.
> >
> > I guess it's nice that I had quite a few months when my anxiety was be fairly effectively treated. That's only a few months out of my whole life, but at least I experienced it. I'll go back to my old ways.
> >
> > I do hope this doesn't leave me with panic attacks. I've never had a full-blown one and the thought scares me.
>
>Haha, I could schedule an appt. for next month and go in with the bold intention of lying everything I'm thinking, feelings, and wondering right out in front of him.
Yet, I know better. It won't happen. We'll probably chat about nothing related to my medications, then he'll ask me right as he walks out the door if I need any refills.
Sometimes it's not quite so drastic if I make it reallllly clear to the nurse who rooms me that I'm having major horrible problems with a medication. I have to make it seem very dramatic for the doctor to even bother glancing at their notes.
The doctors will always take their own history anyway, plus patients don't always bother to tell the nurse anything. I sometimes don't, just because it's pointless to go in to detail with the LPN and hard not to when discussing the matter. So, I'll just say I'm here for a recheck, I'm fine, let's speed up this process a little.
On occasion he'll pop in a decide to focus on my health. I think that's when he's quite pressed for time.
I could just be really quiet with the smalltalk, but that almost never happens. We honestly enjoy our visits together. He tries to relate by thinking about things that went on when he was in med school, sometimes giving my suggestions. I like going because he and his PA who I see really enjoy there jobs, and makes me more passionate about the field, especially when I'm up to my eyeballs in textbooks and notes. (I've slept with books or binders on half my bed nearly every night for the past year... weird? ... no, just insane... at least they keep me company:)
Yeah, so problem #1 is that we often have little time to discuss my medical concerns in detail.
Problem #2 is that I appear far too happy, normal, successful and functional to need high levels of medication and constant monitoring because I am super-sensitive.
Problem #3 is that we talk about drugs. We don't talk a whole lot about symptoms. I'm willing to, even though it's mildly awkward, it wouldn't be if it felt like commonplace when I was there. I think he doesn't probe into dept, or even shallowly, regarding psych problems because he doesn't want to embarass me. I'd be OK with it though.(comorbidities... ADHD, fatigue, anxiety, insomnia, ummm depression that I hide... maybe it's easier for him not to have to ask. Too much!).
poster:jealibeanz
thread:744157
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070413/msgs/750139.html