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To med or not to med? » fluffy

Posted by katia on August 8, 2003, at 15:17:33

In reply to Re: Sleep problems--thanks for input Ron/Katia, posted by fluffy on August 8, 2003, at 10:28:50

> My pdoc had me up my Lamictal dose (again) last night in an attempt to get a sedative effect. I think it kinda worked. I also took a smaller dose of Ambien (5mg). I'm feeling more human this morning. That's all I know. I had totally vivid and gross dreams and woke up several times though. (like in one of them, my friends were opening cans of worms and pouring them on a plate--EEEWWW!) When I woke up, I had trouble getting out of bed, which for me is normal. (hitting the snooze for 30 min. instead of being wide awake at 4 or 5:00 in the morning with teeth clenched).
>
> I'm still nagged by the fact that the Lamictal doesn't "stick". I am at 250mg now, and I don't want to go any further. I guess I should just be happy that I'm somewhat more stable now and go to the contingency when needed. I just worry, worry, worry, as this is the first year I've been on mood stabilizers vs. antidepressants. I fear another episode like nothing else.
>
> How are you doing Katia? Have you started the Depakote yet? May I ask where you live (b/c you're getting your meds in the mail)? Just curious.
>
> Best to everyone,
> Katy
Hi Katy,
I live in a metropolitan area of SF Bay. So it's not that I live in a rural part, it's just that it's cheaper coming from Canada, as my pdoc is Canadian. But just recently I found out that I can be covered under the state system as I'm so poor! So I'm still waiting to start the med b/c I'm waiting for my rx to change to extended release. (b/c Canada has not yet been approved for or gotten the XR formula) anyway complicated story - bottom line I feel very fat right now as I've gained ten lbs. in the past six months and I was really resistent to starting the depakote. I want to LOSE weight now, not gain more - not even one lb. more! But now that I have (almost free) access to the XR formula in the U.S., I'll begin that. Apparently there are less of side effects , like weight gain on the XR.
I'm also feeling a definite rise in my mood - as I felt a week ago. it alternates between feeling "normal" to great to irritable and racy. But I have felt a cloud lift and although it's still partly cloudy it's better than a foggy and thunderous stormy day! So, I've kinda just wanted to give it a go w/o meds for a bit to see what happens. I know everyone does this and eventually ends back on meds, but after a year of trial and error to no success on ADs, I'm a bit disheartened, esp. with this lift in my mood happens when I'm off of everything! I feel back to my old self prior to the major depression that was the impetus for me to get help over a year ago. Not that my "old" self is totally healthy and functioning - not at all, it's just I know how to handle myself with no meds in my mixed bizarre-o state as I've been for most of my life (unless I'm in the throes of a suicidal depression). When meds that don't work enter the picture, things get even crazier.
I'm still sleeping forever tho'. And I don't see how depakote's going to give me energy. I have trouble settling down and falling asleep b/c my energy comes on late afternooon/night. then I finally fall asleep around 2/3 and sleep til noon! It's bizarre. My "symptoms" make no sense.
We'll see. maybe I'll just start the depakote this w-end!
Glad to hear you slept well finally! Just had a cup of coffee and feeling inspired and "high". is that the barometer reading? :-) Where do you live?
katia


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poster:katia thread:9730
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