Posted by DL on June 6, 1999, at 23:55:31
In reply to Re: Sleep, posted by Toby on June 4, 1999, at 12:58:05
> I wonder if the sleep has changed because of the things you worked on in that first session
Could be...the sleep has improved at the moment though. I was scared for a few days that I was slipping back to the total sleep deprivation pattern. Thank heavens it is improving!
>About adding other antidepressants to the Remeron, I don't know if it would do you much good right now
One of the worst things is the weight gain. It undermines self confidence more than anything else. I think I would go out more and enjoy myself more if I didn't feel so unattractive with this extra 25 pounds(since Remeron). I think some of it is a metabolism change but it's also an almost addictive mental connection with food. Intellectually I know I shouldn't eat but in the evening I seem to want to do nothing but eat, and it has little to do with being hungry then. And I am still fighting the "don't feel like doing anything" feeling all the time. I have seen people talk about Naltrexone (?) for addictive leanings and to counteract apathy. I haven't read up on it, how is it used and when? Would this be like adding Cylert (which you suggested last winter?)
>I think it would be best to go to a therapist who does EMDR, but even if that's not an option, just doing 3-4 sessions will be worth many many months in regular talk therapy and then whatever time you spend in regular therapy will progress faster than you would normally expect.
I had another EMDR session on 6/3 and will have 2 more--on6/8 and 6/10. The therapist is going out west to help look for a house etc for the move--for the last few weeks of June into July so I asked to have more sessions intensively if possible. Fell into some really intense feelings last time. Things I had never really processed before.
QUESTIONS
1. I used eye movements this time. Right off I sensed that if I allowed my self, or if the therapist didn't stop periodically, I would float right off with the eye movements. This was similar to when I was young and thought I could float up by the ceiling. The therapist sensed this and altered the pace/timing. Is this just me or does this happen to other people?2. The therapist always reminds me to breathe when she stops the eye movements because I tend to get tense. At one point she changed the direction of the finger movements for a short time (sort of up and down or diagonal up and down) and suddenly I relaxed in the shoulder area. Was this just coincidence? Or is this a technique?
3. I came to some pictures/places where there were no words to describe the pain, grief, sadness, aloneness, anger (yes I sometimes to recognize it there!) and I was silent. I think there was guilt somewhere below it all-I just couldn't talk, even though I think I wanted to. Why is this?
4. This therapist is very perceptive at picking up my physical sensations even when I am blocking them. Why is it so hard for me to tune into how I am feeling, and how emotions affect me physically? If these affects are so easy to see, why don't I recognize them?
5. I did not have as long an after affect with this session as the first. The rambling pictures stopped after a few hours. I'm thinking it's because I hit those areas where I just couldn't share--and that I blocked at that point. I seemed to move out of myself and away from the emotions so they were not accessible to me (during that part of the EMDR). What does this mean?
>I just got the new directory from the EMDR association
> Auburn, Concord, Derry, Exeter, Lebanon, Manchester, Nashua, Plainfield, Plymouth. If any of those are close to you, I will print the names associated with that area so you can explore switching to them when the time comes.There should be more cities listed for NH. My last list had Portsmouth and Dover and Durham listed. Of the ones you listed, Exeter is closest (25 min), Manchester and Concord are both about 45 min drive. Nashua about an hour.
Thanks for the continued support. Now I am trying to get up the courage to call a new psychiatrist. Haven't seen the other one since over 4 months. I only have one refil of Remeron left. I wish there was someone knowledgeable enough to do a thorough work up to check out any medical/physical issues that may be part of the sleep etc. and to figure out what part the hormones play and even to look at the borderline thyroid (remember?)Both the therapist and I feel there are some issues there. I read about doctors/psychiatrists who do this but in NH I don't think they exist. The therapist also suggested a sleep study like you did once. I have asked primary care docs at various times and talked to OB/GYN and psychiatrist and all seemed to pass it off to another person as not their area. OH, well!
would like to get some "get up and go" back!
poster:DL
thread:4833
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990601/msgs/7124.html