Psycho-Babble Writing Thread 384367

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I hear the distant thunder

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 30, 2004, at 21:56:29

I hear the distant thunder
it pounds through my body
like a pulse
I lay down on the moist earth of moss
my eyes closed
lightning plays a hot pink with crescents of blue violet
I wait and listen
insects hum
I am you
my beloved earth

 

Re: I hear the distant thunder » Jai Narayan

Posted by Atticus on August 31, 2004, at 8:51:42

In reply to I hear the distant thunder, posted by Jai Narayan on August 30, 2004, at 21:56:29

This poem, wonderfully written, really brings home to me the environment you live in, and how radically different it is from my own. Your relationship to the land and my relationship to the city are, interestingly, really reflected in the peaceful rhythms of this poem and the jangly, edgy tone that comes most naturally to me. Your heart beats to the thunder of nature, mine to the thunder of the urban landscape. :) Atticus the city chile

 

I love your pulse...what can I say? (nm)

Posted by Jai Narayan on August 31, 2004, at 20:49:57

In reply to Re: I hear the distant thunder » Jai Narayan, posted by Atticus on August 31, 2004, at 8:51:42

 

Re: I hear the distant thunder » Jai Narayan

Posted by malthus on August 31, 2004, at 21:52:43

In reply to I hear the distant thunder, posted by Jai Narayan on August 30, 2004, at 21:56:29

...(the)lightning plays a hot pink with crescents of blue violet..."

Colors really strike me in your poetry. They say the sense of smell is the strongest in evoking memories, which I believe is true, but colors are right up there for me. It's like I can see you lying there with those colors surrounding you...very beautiful.

malthus


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