Shown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by verne on October 9, 2005, at 2:28:57
81 days sober but I would have drank today if I had a way to get it. I'm too far from the store, don't drive, and have an agreement with my one remaining, driving, friend not to take me.
This is basically a relapse and I need to make some changes. I just can't continue on a "dry drunk" and not really work on the problem.
What made me especially vulnerable is that I have a sore throat. When I'm sick I want to medicate with alcohol.
Wanting to change how I felt, I spent the afternoon harvesting morning glory seeds, ground them, and ingested about 200. Supposed to contain a weak relative of LSD.
Anyway, not much happened with the seeds. I think I need to put them through some sort of extraction process to get the full effect. I've gotten a kind of speedy high with the raw seeds before but at a much higher dose.
Tonight I didn't want to take a full dose for fear I would upset my stomach - in addition to the sore throat. Anyway, I'm deliberately staying up so that I sleep in tomorrow, leaving less time to plot a beer run. I'm really on thin ice.
I'll be quiet.
Verne
Posted by ClearSkies on October 9, 2005, at 8:24:48
In reply to Wet Brain, posted by verne on October 9, 2005, at 2:28:57
I've been able to distract myself with physical chores, even though they are the last thing I want to do. Giving my body something to do seems to help relieve my brain even if only for a bit.
This week I tackled the enormous mass of junk living under my bathroom sink. I try not to pick too big a task - something that might take 20 minutes or so. It does seem to help me.
ClearSkies
Posted by woodywho on October 10, 2005, at 18:41:29
In reply to Re: Wet Brain, posted by ClearSkies on October 9, 2005, at 8:24:48
Yes, small tasks do seem to help for me. From my experience, the second I try to do TOO much at one time though it makes it worse. I have found that trying to do something constructive, but not overwhelming eases the mind.
I also play my favorite music while trying to do so, which seems to help out quite a bit.
Posted by verne on October 13, 2005, at 12:22:25
In reply to Wet Brain, posted by verne on October 9, 2005, at 2:28:57
I'm still struggling but this is day 86. Bad sign that I'm counting I suppose. I should say I've been sober since I got up this morning.
I've backed off the pot idea, and feel like the missiles have been recalled.
Down with the flu, I've been close to drinking all week but I'm starting to feel like there's hope again. I got my lab work results in the mail this morning and was surprised that everything, including my liver panel, was normal except cholesterol. (222 Total)
But five minutes later, I thought, "gee, now that my liver is normal, I can drink again". No end to the temptation and crazy dry-drunk reasoning.
Verne
Posted by AuntieMel on October 14, 2005, at 9:19:42
In reply to Dry Drunk, posted by verne on October 13, 2005, at 12:22:25
My liver was normal, too, thankfully.
But if I'd kept it up much longer it wouldn't be.
Counting the days at this stage is normal. Each day is a miracle.
Posted by verne on October 15, 2005, at 1:03:46
In reply to Re: Dry Drunk » verne, posted by AuntieMel on October 14, 2005, at 9:19:42
Binged on some low-carb ice cream instead of drinking. My daughter went shopping for me since I'm still down with a slight case, mixture really, of avian flu, West Nile virus, drainfly fever, and the odd Andromeda strain.
She brought back juice, six lbs of Johnathan apples, 5 packages of Wasa rye crisp wafers, and 3 jars of natural peanut butter. (she shopped from my list).
I'm hanging on. I'm thankful for my healthy lab results and my daughter's help. Hoping to do the borderline personality disorder course at home, meditate, exercise, and read more when I get back on my feet.
I have a lot of great "AA" literature like "Stepping Stones To Recovery", "Seven Weeks To Sobriety", and tons of "new age" self-help books I've yet to read. What's crazy is that I've been waiting until I "feel better" to do the things that might help me feel better.
i'll be quiet.
Verne
Posted by verne on October 16, 2005, at 8:40:54
In reply to 88 Days, posted by verne on October 15, 2005, at 1:03:46
I've lost track, can't do the math - my head bustling with so many germs, some are on a waiting list. I had to turn ebola away. Sorry, no room.
I've thrown everything at this malady - chinese herbs, over-the-counter anti-virals, the usual vitamins, grapefruit seed extract, and a healing spell from dungeons and dragons that may only work on elves.
I'm rarely sick, but when I am, I rediscover just how histronic I can get when I'm in pain. I'm accustomed to whining when I'm not sick. What do I do when I'm actually sick?
Thankful I'm not drinking anyway.
Verne
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Substance Use | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD, bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.