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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 20:50:19
In reply to Re: thanks guys, posted by sleepygirl on June 22, 2005, at 20:43:42
Its just im not all that emotional....i do feel alot so Im not sure how the two go together but everyone else seems so disconnected...whereas I feel disconnected from emotion....sigh...I dont get it. does that make sense?
Posted by sleepygirl on June 22, 2005, at 21:35:29
In reply to Re: thanks guys » sleepygirl, posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 20:50:19
hhhmmmm, You're disconnected from emotion? or from others? or both? Can you elaborate?
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 21:56:17
In reply to Re: thanks guys, posted by sleepygirl on June 22, 2005, at 21:35:29
I feel disconnected from emotion...like im not emotional but I am also very full of emotion ...confuses me too.
i just feel like my emotions are so differnet than people around me IRL. Im having a really hard time trying to elaborate....hmm
People experience the same emotions as me...I know that. but they experience them with totally differnet events. I dont know if that is clear?and becasue I feel some what crappy I have been disconnecitn form people so kinda a yes to all
I guess emotionally I feel like I am water balloon and I am being stepped on with alot of pressure....soon POP! but for others dealing with the same sh*t they seem like flowers floating in the wind. well thats an exageration....but I dont feel ok to fully express myself because no one else does. Now I say I dont feel ok doing it....but that doesnt stop me, I do it anyway...and then I feel like Im kind of unstable and like crap :-( (in other words I burst today :-( ) easier to put it that way....no one else seems to burst :-( ?
Posted by justyourlaugh on June 22, 2005, at 22:06:55
In reply to Re: thanks guys » sleepygirl, posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 21:56:17
took me many moons to undersatnd and realize..my thought process was different..
i was down the wrong path...i know i do not want the one they had to pave...
i have knowledge now...(babble has given me great power)..
i am very connected to emotion...i wonder where the hell everyone else is..
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 22:17:04
In reply to hummmm..., posted by justyourlaugh on June 22, 2005, at 22:06:55
I wish I new...Id love to go back
I dont like feeling connected to emotions. when I blow and I mean anger I dont enjoy it at all. is it possible to be connected with anger in a good way? ugh
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 22:35:16
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 22:17:04
I suck a trying to express myslef...there is so much in my head and Im feeling consumed by it....whay dosnt anyone else feel like that :-( Im just in a bad mood today
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 23:26:37
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 22:35:16
im misunderstood in here too i think
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 23:35:50
In reply to ahhhhhhhhh!, posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 23:26:37
all in all I feel so much fu*king better!! Only I cant sleep right now...
Posted by partlycloudy on June 23, 2005, at 5:34:29
In reply to ahhhhhhhhh!, posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 23:26:37
Do you really think so? Sometimes I feel like my emotions are kicked up way too high, distorted and out of proportion. Other times they are not apparent at all.
I try to go with the flow, tell myself that it's natural - for me.
My last (and not very good) therapist told me anger was "bad". I thought that anger was an emotion like any other - neither good nor bad, just there, a natural part of us. I'm not effective at expressing it. It usually ends badly for me. I either keep it in and let it fester until it comes out like a bolus of poison, misunderstood... or else I cry and cry instead of putting the anger into words.I'm a grownup. You'd think I'd have it figured out by now. But my growth has been stunted for a very long time, and learning how to express myself effectively and in a healthy way is difficult for me. I keep trying. I keep trying.
pc
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 10:30:26
In reply to Re: ahhhhhhhhh! » rainbowbrite, posted by partlycloudy on June 23, 2005, at 5:34:29
> Do you really think so? Sometimes I feel like my emotions are kicked up way too high, distorted and out of proportion. Other times they are not apparent at all.
> I try to go with the flow, tell myself that it's natural - for me.
Oh I dont know...just had a bad day. I always get my emotions out but sometimes I lose control with anger and I hate it....and then just in general I dont feel like people get me. No big deal, its just lonely at times I suppose.
I say things that people often take completely the opposite of what I mean....grr I frustrate myself at times> I'm not effective at expressing it. It usually ends badly for me. I either keep it in and let it fester until it comes out like a bolus of poison, misunderstood... or else I cry and cry instead of putting the anger into words.
I think I always get out whats bugging me (if I want to get it out) or whatever but I think when my stress level builds to a certain point, I turn into a time bomb. Sometimes I dont know what Im feeling or why Im upset but..
> I'm a grownup. You'd think I'd have it figured out by now. But my growth has been stunted for a very long time, and learning how to express myself effectively and in a healthy way is difficult for me. I keep trying. I keep trying.
No I dont agree that a 'grownup' should have it all figured out....how can people figure sh*t out when everyone else around them is crazy!!?? you know....I think there are so many in the closet mentally screwed up people that they just take others down with them inadvertantly. know one seems to understand what others are trying to say or think and so the reactions people get are sometimes way out there..thus leading to misunderstandings...
And the most important is that you try...and keep trying. :-)thanks
Posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 20:15:14
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 22:35:16
you're reminding me of a circuit breaker, you know when there's too much electricity (energy) going on it just shuts down
I often feel like quite a freak concerning my emotions, their ridiculous intensity maybe or feeling like I react strangely. You know what, I probably am strange, a real freak!, but I don't care as much anymore.
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 20:28:54
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 20:15:14
>>you're reminding me of a circuit breaker, you know when there's too much electricity (energy) going on it just shuts down
Hey thats good!! Thats such a good way of describing how I feel!! im starting to sputter lol
>>I often feel like quite a freak concerning my emotions, their ridiculous intensity maybe or feeling like I react strangely. You know what, I probably am strange, a real freak!, but I don't care as much anymore.
I just feel lik emy emotions are way over the intensity that I can handle. Too much external stress. i feel like Im dizzy and my head hurts...the worst part is that through this I have just noticed that I am totally withdrawing from people, I need to pull out of that fast. I just hate being with people who dont understand when I feel like this.AND I dont you are a freak!
I dont think Im a freak lol but I think I tend to FREAK when Im overwhellmed :-) So at the moment Im a freak :-)
Posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 20:46:19
In reply to Re: hummmm... » sleepygirl, posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 20:28:54
I was wondering if that way in anyway descriptive, because I used to feel like that A LOT. I'd spend days with my head swimming until I just shut down emotionally, I couldn't do it anymore. It wasn't in my control, I think it was a survival mechanism.
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 21:02:30
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 20:46:19
yeah I think thats how I feel now...how did you get it to stop?
Posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 21:07:35
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 21:02:30
oh, I wish I could say it wasn't difficult. Some of my life circumstances got better, meds, talking about traumas, reducing my stress level, therapy, therapy, therapy
I really limit my socialization though I have to say, sometimes I just can't handle too much. Some people understand that, some don't.
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 21:26:57
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 21:07:35
so have you found a way to keep your circuits in tact when in crisis mode?
Posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 21:39:28
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 21:26:57
somewhat.... I don't do what I'd call the numbing out thing anymore, at least not as dramatically as I used to feel it. I'm connected to my emotions more, because they aren't quite as overwhelming. I'm afraid that's probably the meds.
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 23, 2005, at 21:53:13
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 21:39:28
well meds are making me feel quite calm at the moment lol
I dont like them but sometimes we must use desparate measures....sigh..
Posted by Jazzed on June 23, 2005, at 23:34:39
In reply to Re: thanks guys » sleepygirl, posted by rainbowbrite on June 22, 2005, at 21:56:17
Your perceptions and experiences are different than anyone else's. No one can feel things exactly the way you do.
I always figured my siblings grew up in the same house, obviously they had the same experiences and feelings, but I found out, as an adult, that their's were completely different. It blew me away that they were SO different. We had the same parents, lived in the same house, etc.... But they feel things and deal with things so vastly differently than I do.
Now I see that it's that way with everyone, and it's very confusing. Our filters, defenses, and feelings are all different. I guess depending on how we grew up, were treated, and how we're wired to begin with.
Does that make any sense?
Jazzy
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 24, 2005, at 0:26:01
In reply to Re: thanks guys » rainbowbrite, posted by Jazzed on June 23, 2005, at 23:34:39
> Your perceptions and experiences are different than anyone else's. No one can feel things exactly the way you do.
I know but.....but....but...
> I always figured my siblings grew up in the same house, obviously they had the same experiences and feelings, but I found out, as an adult, that their's were completely different. It blew me away that they were SO different. We had the same parents, lived in the same house, etc.... But they feel things and deal with things so vastly differently than I do.
Oh absolutely! yes Ive noticed the same thing. It really interesting actually...how differnet people are even when growing up together. I wonder whats better? being distant from emotion or being close with it....youd think Id be perfect since Im not distant and Im not all that close...but I AM SO NOT!!
> Now I see that it's that way with everyone, and it's very confusing. Our filters, defenses, and feelings are all different. I guess depending on how we grew up, were treated, and how we're wired to begin with.
but why Jazzy.....why?
Posted by Jazzed on June 24, 2005, at 23:12:07
In reply to Re: thanks guys » Jazzed, posted by rainbowbrite on June 24, 2005, at 0:26:01
>
> I know but.....but....but...
>> > Now I see that it's that way with everyone, and it's very confusing. Our filters, defenses, and feelings are all different. I guess depending on how we grew up, were treated, and how we're wired to begin with.
>
>
> but why Jazzy.....why?
I don't understand this either rain, it doesn't make any sense to me. I want to trust my senses, because if I don't I'll go crazy. When I was a teen-ager, I had problems, and told my older brother some of the stuff I felt, and he gave me that advice, which has kept me sane so many times. He said, "you have to trust your senses". Seems so simple, but it isn't always.If I trust my senses, and the intense emotions that I have, then I figure I can stay grounded. I know I'll be misunderstood a lot of the time, I'll be hurt by others who lash out at me because I'm very thin skinned, but I hope to be forgiven when I screw up, and hope I don't get so mad at others that I alienate them.
Did I veer off the topic here? It's late my head hurts, time for Ambien! I love my Ambien.
Jazzy
nighty night rain!
Posted by cockeyed on June 25, 2005, at 0:53:25
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by sleepygirl on June 23, 2005, at 20:15:14
What does "hummmmmmm" mean. You people are all *trange. I'm so glad that I am a perfect and complete A.H. Hummmmmmm, cockeyed.
Posted by Jazzed on June 25, 2005, at 7:34:30
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by cockeyed on June 25, 2005, at 0:53:25
> What does "hummmmmmm" mean. You people are all *trange. I'm so glad that I am a perfect and complete A.H. Hummmmmmm, cockeyed.
What is it that you don't understand about hmmm cockeyed? If you're not understanding, then maybe you fell into one of those quantum physics black holes! OMGosh.....cockeeeeeeyyyyyyed, where aaaarrrreeeee yooooooou! Coooooommmmmeeee
baaaaack!Jazzy
just kidding btw!
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 25, 2005, at 10:11:42
In reply to Re: hummmm..., posted by cockeyed on June 25, 2005, at 0:53:25
hey im perfect and complette as well...!!
you will have to ask jyl what HUM mean....besides what you do with you mouth and the tune of a song Im not sure what it could mean?
Posted by rainbowbrite on June 25, 2005, at 10:22:30
In reply to Re: thanks guys » rainbowbrite, posted by Jazzed on June 24, 2005, at 23:12:07
>>
I don't understand this either rain, it doesn't make any sense to me. I want to trust my senses, because if I don't I'll go crazy. When I was a teen-ager, I had problems, and told my older brother some of the stuff I felt, and he gave me that advice, which has kept me sane so many times. He said, "you have to trust your senses". Seems so simple, but it isn't always.>If I trust my senses, and the intense emotions that I have, then I figure I can stay grounded. I know I'll be misunderstood a lot of the time, I'll be hurt by others who lash out at me because I'm very thin skinned, but I hope to be forgiven when I screw up, and hope I don't get so mad at others that I alienate them.
>Did I veer off the topic here? It's late my head hurts, time for Ambien! I love my Ambien.
nah I dont think you did lol but I may have already been confused HAHA (kidding)
yeah your brotehr is right, I do tend to trust my feelings etc...I have to becaseu as far as Im concerned everyone is is just plain nuts around me ;-) I mean they sort of are...and sort of arent.
GOd I dont know, Im one of the more rational ones, although I can be distracted easily down the road of irrational thinking but Im logical and I personally think my head is screwed on da*m tight....so ?? Why the problems? .....sigh...just sucks. I think external sources can drive a person bonkers!! In otherwords....Its everyone else not me...I have figured it out! ITS NOT ME IT everyone else :-D YAY!! I need to write a book!! Maybe im delusional? :-)thanks JAzzY
-BritebowRain :-)
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