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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Slinky on March 28, 2004, at 18:00:41
Suppose it's best to be paranoid-my head plays games-it's like ..
I can't understand the mindset of others who just wanna leech.,play games cause they know you're history of mental illness-I feel stupid...too nice for life.
One day I'll get angry...just like old times...then again what's the point.
blahx3
Posted by Karen_kay on March 28, 2004, at 20:13:16
In reply to How to know when to trust-paranoid again, posted by Slinky on March 28, 2004, at 18:00:41
Well, I know that I'm often accused of being naive and a bit too trusting. But, I don't ever want to hurt anyone, so I naturally assume no one wants to hurt me. Of course, it happens that people do hurt me, but it's so much more often with words than with taking advantage. I'll give until I'm empty, but knowing that I'm doing what I can (even if I feel it's never near enough) helps fill that *emptiness* that I have. I think a little less paranoia never hurts.
Perhaps they have to leech because they don't realize their own capabilities? Maybe you could learn a lot more by helping to show them that? Or just telling them to scram? I like to think of the "leeches" as wonderful in a way, because it shows that I'm needed, and everyone loves to feel needed. Could you think of it that way? If not, maybe tell them to scram...
And Slinky my dear, there just isn't a such thing as too nice for life. But, if there was, I'm sure you'd fall into that category..
Posted by Slinky on March 28, 2004, at 21:32:21
In reply to Re: How to know when to trust-paranoid again, posted by Karen_kay on March 28, 2004, at 20:13:16
I'm saying scram stop scrambling my brain!..this certain person hinted about needing money for weed..and although I feel sorry for him because of his schizophrenia I ain't no way.
I do help/have helped - giving cd's letting him use my pc and that's the limit.
I'm too soft 'cause I realy wanna YELL 'LEAVE ME BE' -and it don't look sexy..
I've already frightened the neighbours tiny children ..I'm a mad witch to them.
I'm a bit lonesome lately..my almost ex-partner mashes up my emotions ..
I'm saving up for a paraglider
Posted by TexasChic on March 29, 2004, at 14:25:19
In reply to Re: How to know when to trust-paranoid again » Karen_kay, posted by Slinky on March 28, 2004, at 21:32:21
I've been in the same boat many, many times. I believe there are people out there that look for people who are trusting and kind hearted, and then they exploit them to the max. Its purely manipulation. These people will look at you with bewilderment and hurt on their face when you stand up to them, but you have to remember you don't owe them anything! Its okay to say, nope, sorry, I need that money (or time, or whatever) for myself. It may seem mean, but when you're being manipulated, so what! There is no reason you should feel bad for not wanting to give this person money. That's your hard earned money, and you have the right to spend it how you see fit.
Posted by Slinky on March 29, 2004, at 23:55:13
In reply to Re: How to know when to trust-paranoid again, posted by TexasChic on March 29, 2004, at 14:25:19
I don't know why..I used to be assertive.
Maybe my meds make me nice ( not all the time : ))
I just can't get out what I want to say.
The last time I said what I felt was to my doc and because I'd been placid mostly he put me on depakote- I was right to get angry.
I'm worrying about it too much..
Posted by TexasChic on March 30, 2004, at 9:48:10
In reply to Re: How to know when to trust-paranoid again » TexasChic, posted by Slinky on March 29, 2004, at 23:55:13
Do you see a therapist Slinky? I can totally identify with everything you've said. I've been there, and still am there in many ways. I grew up being such a people pleaser. But therapy helped so-o-o much in helping me realize that its okay to to put me first. Its so easy to get sucked in when you feel sorry for the person, but its not up to you to solve their problems. Its up to them to find it in themselves. But they won't ever do it as long as they have someone else who will do it for them. So you are actually doing them a favor by saying no. I know its easier said than done, I still don't always suceed myself. But I think I'm doing alot better at it.
Posted by Slinky on March 30, 2004, at 23:17:59
In reply to Re: How to know when to trust-paranoid again, posted by TexasChic on March 30, 2004, at 9:48:10
Hi
No I don't see a therapist - uk mental health is very poor.
I said no today when the guy phoned talking a sob story ( I can't tell if it's lies anymore) but the phone was almost slamed down by him.
I felt much better afterwards for saying no.
I have to remind myself that I must come first but I think I carry a kind of self harm - I deserve it burden - that needs lifting.Take care of yourself and thanks for listening.
Posted by Dinah on March 31, 2004, at 7:47:23
In reply to Re: How to know when to trust-paranoid again » TexasChic, posted by Slinky on March 30, 2004, at 23:17:59
Good for you, Slinky! That's practically the first thing my therapist worked on with me, in regard to my parents. I can't say I have it perfect yet, but I'm better than I was. :)
This is the end of the thread.
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