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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 18 of 18. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 4:57:37
I hate when it happens that I wake from a dream feeling that I really don't belong in my time and at my present age. Last night, I dreamed that I was again romantically involved with a woman as if I were still 28 years old and as it occurred during the 1980s. I wanted to stay there. Now that I am here again, nothing seems right. I feel somehow upset that my present is not what my past seemed to indicate it would be. Depression changed everything. It is a thief.
I feel weird right now. I am disoriented. Things aren't the same. I sense dissatisfaction. I sense loss. I sense death. I sense mourning. I sense unfairness. I do not sense the world that I left before I went to sleep to dream. I am nowhere.
- Scott
Posted by raisinb on April 11, 2009, at 8:33:47
In reply to Dreams can be disorienting., posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 4:57:37
Scott, I have dreams like that frequently. They were worse, however, when I was on certain meds--I don't know if yours right now would be causing such vivid dreams?
In a day or so, you will be able to shake off that upsetting flavor the dream left you with, and perhaps gain some wisdom from it, too.
Posted by rskontos on April 11, 2009, at 9:40:44
In reply to Dreams can be disorienting., posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 4:57:37
SLS,
I often do that. I often have dreams with strange people that i am watching do stuff. I have repeatedly ask my pdoc for interpretations of my dreams. I am not always satisfied with his answers.
You say you are upset over your present not being like your past, maybe that is it. I don't konw.
Maybe it is your brains way of working through your present dissatisfaction.
I have a couple of re-occuring dreams in which I would like to remain. But sadly I can't.
I am not much help other to say yeah I am there with you.
rsk
Posted by rskontos on April 11, 2009, at 9:42:14
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » SLS, posted by raisinb on April 11, 2009, at 8:33:47
raisin
I am on very few meds at the moment so for me I think it is just the past and my feelings over it coming to roost.
I wished i could gain wisdom but the eludes me too.
rsk
Posted by Phillipa on April 11, 2009, at 13:17:59
In reply to Dreams can be disorienting., posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 4:57:37
Scott the same thing seriously is happening to me almost nightly to the point I don't want to go asleep as will have to wake up. Mine are when my kids were kids and married to first husband and doing fun things. Same here so disorienting and so hard to find reality again. And looking in the mirror doesn't help. For me I'm end of thirties just when started nursing and felt so good. And so physically fit. It's a longing for who we were that is my interrpretation so I have to get out anywhere to try and forget. Find myself crying at night before posting of all the past deaths I've seen my Mother included. Could you Wonderful Grand Mothers Death Have Triggered it? Just A thought. As seriously need to find an answer also so sleep will once again be pleasureable. Love Jan/Phillipa
Posted by fayeroe on April 11, 2009, at 17:29:38
In reply to Dreams can be disorienting., posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 4:57:37
Scott, I've been having very disturbing dreams the past couple of months. I attribute it to the Buspar. I may be wrong on that as it could be the canyons of my brain are full of silt.
I dream about my ex husband and life is as it was. You know? Happy and fulfilling..no lies..just trust and unconditional love. I'm not having to work to please anyone as I did then.
I even dreamed that we went to see Bob Seger. We did go to see him for my 4oth birthday..
Posted by Sigismund on April 11, 2009, at 17:42:56
In reply to Dreams can be disorienting., posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 4:57:37
>I sense dissatisfaction. I sense loss. I sense death. I sense mourning. I sense unfairness.
Yes, and why not?
It would be nice to get rid of the mourning, but you seem to be mourning the loss of things and possibilities you once had, so in that sense it is reasonable.When you were 28, hey?
Posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 18:37:49
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » SLS, posted by Sigismund on April 11, 2009, at 17:42:56
> >I sense dissatisfaction. I sense loss. I sense death. I sense mourning. I sense unfairness.
>
> Yes, and why not?
> It would be nice to get rid of the mourning, but you seem to be mourning the loss of things and possibilities you once had, so in that sense it is reasonable.
>
> When you were 28, hey?1988.
Now 40-something.
Pushing 50.Gosh.
- Scott
Posted by HyperFocus on April 11, 2009, at 18:53:21
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » SLS, posted by Sigismund on April 11, 2009, at 17:42:56
>I sense dissatisfaction. I sense loss. I sense death. I sense mourning. I sense unfairness.
I don't really believe in interpreting dreams - I think dreams are just a side-effect of your brain processing and integrating your experiences for that day. I do think however that dreams have theraputic significance - I find it interesting that we seem to experience ourselves in dreams minus our illness (more on this in another post.) At any rate dreams are connected to important things that are going on that we may not be conscious of.
Maybe these things are memories of events that impacted you before depression set in. After a long period of experienceing dissatisfaction, loss, mourning unfairness, death, your brain may have degenerated into depression. As the depression lasted over years you may have become more and more separated from the these original feelings. You may have quickly come to a point where these past feelings and events from long ago are irrelevant to your present life - you just want to treat the depression. But as the biological depression recedes these feelings and events may surprise you by reappearing.
Just a guess but could this be a good sign - that the illness is receding and you are now back in touch with the feelings that may have triggered the depression?
Posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 19:49:46
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting., posted by HyperFocus on April 11, 2009, at 18:53:21
> Just a guess but could this be a good sign - that the illness is receding and you are now back in touch with the feelings that may have triggered the depression?
I'll have to think about that one.
Thanks.
- Scott
Posted by Sigismund on April 11, 2009, at 20:09:45
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » Sigismund, posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 18:37:49
No one can believe I'm 56 or whatever I am.
I show no signs of mature stability.
Posted by Sigismund on April 11, 2009, at 20:14:28
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » HyperFocus, posted by SLS on April 11, 2009, at 19:49:46
Consciousness is multilayered like the onion.
We feel something and we feel something about it, and so on ad infinitum.
I try to limit the distress by telling myself that, however bad it is, there is no reason for me to add to it by feeling bad about it again.
I can't remember if this is at all relevant.
Posted by Zana on April 16, 2009, at 13:06:25
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting., posted by Sigismund on April 11, 2009, at 20:14:28
I agree about the sense of mourning the real losses depression has brought about in your life. It also sounds to me as though you are in the midst of a depression right now. How are things going?
Zana
Posted by Sigismund on April 16, 2009, at 17:21:19
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting., posted by Zana on April 16, 2009, at 13:06:25
>It also sounds to me as though you are in the midst of a depression right now. How are things going?
You talking to me?I am inhabited by a cry, but I feel much better when people pay attention to me.
Since I have (more or less) felt like this all my life, there is no reason to believe in remission or any of that stuff about depression.
But you're right.
Yeah. Oh well.
Posted by Phillipa on April 16, 2009, at 19:48:25
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » Zana, posted by Sigismund on April 16, 2009, at 17:21:19
Sigi you're depressed so sorry. Love PJ
Posted by Sigismund on April 16, 2009, at 23:57:11
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » Sigismund, posted by Phillipa on April 16, 2009, at 19:48:25
Nothing new, PJ. It's the human condition.
Everyone tries to tell the other that their pain is worse, while we live in a system that denies it all.
[Depression = depressed mood(?) for more than (wait for it) 2 weeks(?!).]
It may have been about TS Eliot, I don't know, something about layers and that under that there was another sound, like a child crying in an empty church.
I'd like to say I'm too proud to be happy, but the irony is rather a strain.
General anaesthetic please.
Posted by SLS on April 17, 2009, at 7:03:51
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » Phillipa, posted by Sigismund on April 16, 2009, at 23:57:11
> Everyone tries to tell the other that their pain is worse, while we live in a system that denies it all.
Each person's hell is the worst they will ever know.
- Scott
Posted by Zana on April 17, 2009, at 12:06:13
In reply to Re: Dreams can be disorienting. » Zana, posted by Sigismund on April 16, 2009, at 17:21:19
Thanks for asking. I added Pristiq to the stew of meds I am on and I have been feeling better, more alive, more sense of possibilities for the future. I still am not all there--yet. I feel as if I have this weird brain budge, like I just can't imagine what to do with myself. It's so weird. It's like a lack of imagination. I can't for the life of me think what to make for dinner except pasta. I'm just at a complete loss. I just joined a new gym but have yet to get myself there. I kinds betwixt and between. Undepressed enough to have a glimmer of what my life could be like but still too stuck to move forward. It's very frustrating and excrutiatingly boring. I just hope the Pristiq et al hold me. I have been so terribly depressed these last 18 months. It's been like nothing I ever experienced before even though I would say I have suffered with depression and anxiety my whole life. It's been traumatic and is proving hard to recover from.
Thanks again for your interest.Zana
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