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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by star008 on November 24, 2007, at 4:14:07
Ramblings at 530 am and really I am not totally insane.. I just don't sleep. I wish we were all together cuz I don't think anyone else understands. I work in a hospital and have seen many suicides. They call me to ER when someone comes in. It is my job to keep them breathing.
I saw an 18 year old with marks still around his neck.. He hung himself in the basement.. I kept him breathing but he was dead. I saw a 60 year old.. Same thing Kept her breathing but she was dead..so many more of them..the families cry and talk about selfishness. Don't they understand the constant pain that some people can't indure anymore? The staff make jokes(to make themselves feel better, to separate)? They talk about selfishness and "attention seeking".. I try to tell them that a suicide attept is an awful extreme form of attention getting. I try to tell them that some people have such painful lives. Is it that they just don't get it?? Do "normal" people never have these thoughts?? Sometimes they make fun of people who have died through suicide. All I can do is bite my tongue and try to tell them that some people hurt so much.. they don't get it or don't want to see it?? Is it something that people living their "normal lives" don't want to see?? It is just all so awful to me.. I know how these people feel.. The ones who can't go on and I can't do anything to change the way people feel about them.Is this too much?? You can delete it if it is but it is reality.. So sad..I live it.. I see it
Posted by I need a hug on November 24, 2007, at 18:58:02
In reply to trigger warning. sad one, posted by star008 on November 24, 2007, at 4:14:07
STAR,
Do you think maybe it is a coping mechanism for family and friends to say suicide is a selfish act. Instead of asking themselves, "What if I would have done this?," or "What if I had said this?," they blame everything on the victim and do not accept any responsibility for what happenned. I don't think people pay close enough attention to or even know what the warning signs are of a suicidal person. Just a thought. Just like you, I don't sleep. I have a sleep disorder and never sleep more than a few hours at a time. If you are up and want to chat, I'm usually up half of the night reading posts anyway. If you want to set up a time, post something and I'll check in later. HUGS
Posted by Raindancer on November 24, 2007, at 19:16:20
In reply to Re: trigger warning. sad one, posted by I need a hug on November 24, 2007, at 18:58:02
I don't sleep too well either. I think this is because I'm scared I shall wake up in the middle of the night (and worry!!) if i go to sleep too early, so have got into the habit of pottering and reading until about 2.30 a.m. Think also the late evenings work best for me - when I wake up it is morning again and I have to pick myself up and do it all again.
I think it's hard to face life when the pain goes on and on and I think suicide is an extreme way of "not feeling" the pain any more. So it's not the wanting to die, but the longing for relief and also the guilt at not being able to participate in life in a way that feels acceptable to others (or ourselves).
all thoughts and wishes to you both. Rain
Posted by star008 on November 24, 2007, at 20:19:57
In reply to Re: trigger warning. sad one, posted by I need a hug on November 24, 2007, at 18:58:02
Thanks for the offer.. I would love to chat with you but tonite I am at work and supposed to be working..lol
Posted by I need a hug on November 25, 2007, at 13:45:32
In reply to trigger warning. sad one, posted by star008 on November 24, 2007, at 4:14:07
Are you supposed to get a paycheck when you are supposed to be working? LOL
Posted by star008 on November 25, 2007, at 15:35:28
In reply to Re: trigger warning. sad one, posted by I need a hug on November 25, 2007, at 13:45:32
yes.. they pay me evrytime I am supposed to be working!!! lol... I can play on the computer sometimes but chatting won't work there.. If I get a page I am actually supposed to answer it.. imagine that//;)
Posted by I need a hug on November 25, 2007, at 16:30:00
In reply to Re: trigger warning. sad one » I need a hug, posted by star008 on November 25, 2007, at 15:35:28
I get to play on my computer, collect my disability check and I don't have to go out when the weather is sh*tty!! I win!!! Honestly, I'd much rather be working.
Posted by star008 on November 26, 2007, at 7:50:27
In reply to Re: trigger warning. sad one, posted by I need a hug on November 25, 2007, at 16:30:00
As much as I hate working sometimes it really is better than staying at home, (at least for me). I ahved to take care of people and it takes my mind off of me.. I do better when I work. It gives me some purpose when I don't feel that I have any.. I get to talk to people at work and sometimes have fun.. On one hand, work sucks, on the other, it is better for me..
Posted by B2chica on November 27, 2007, at 10:45:12
In reply to trigger warning. sad one, posted by star008 on November 24, 2007, at 4:14:07
i think people say it's selfish because they are angry. and because they don't understand suicide, because they don't understand depression.
for the last time that person was once again...misunderstood.
This is the end of the thread.
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