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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by seldomseen on October 16, 2007, at 7:43:32
And always has.
Whenever I share something sexual with him - whether it be a dream or an ideation or really just a thought - he makes it about him and our relationship.
I've noticed it before, but yesterday I shared a dream with him and he related it to him and the role he played him my life.
He always makes it therapeutic though and it really did turn out to be a good session about some potential CSA (something that we've hit on before). I gotta say though, it's a little disconcerting and leaves me to wonder if somehow he isn't a little stimulated by it.
NOW, keep in mind, I've been with this guy for years and he's never and isn't going to cross the therapeutic boundary - at least not physically. THere have been times emotionally when he has not only crossed the boundary with self-disclosure, but broke the sound barrier when he did so.
I also wonder if my feelings about this might be resistance to some CSA stuff myself.
Does anyone else's T insert themselves into sexual discussion? What do you guys think about it.
Seldom.
Posted by pegasus on October 16, 2007, at 10:42:48
In reply to One thing about my T that bugs me., posted by seldomseen on October 16, 2007, at 7:43:32
Hi seldomseen,
Yeah, some therapists always do that. For example, if you read any of Ivin Yalom's books, he's always doing that. At first I thought it was kind of narcissistic, but then I learned about the theory behind it. Which, as I understand it, is that when you can bring teh conversation around to relate to the actual relationship that is in the room, you can sometimes learn things in a more immediate, and therefore, theoretically, more effective way, than you do when you talk about things that are in the past or future. In other words, if you talk about what you are feeling right in that moment, then it can often be more meaningful. So, some therapists are always working on your feelings toward them, because that's part of what is immediately happening in the here and now of your sessions. Does that make sense.
And, then, there is also always the possibility that this orientation appeals to your T because he's also a little narcissistic, or otherwise stimulated by it. They all have their motivations, too, I suppose. :)
peg
Posted by seldomseen on October 16, 2007, at 19:18:38
In reply to Re: One thing about my T that bugs me., posted by pegasus on October 16, 2007, at 10:42:48
thanks peg. It actually makes a lot of sense now. In fact he has a book by that author in his office.
And like I said, he usually would bring it around to a very insightful discussion and maybe it will get a little better now that I know that he likely not really inserting himself in there.
Seldom.
Posted by Dinah on October 18, 2007, at 9:44:45
In reply to One thing about my T that bugs me., posted by seldomseen on October 16, 2007, at 7:43:32
My therapist is as careful as I am to strip the sexual content from even the most sexually themed of my dreams about him.
Mind you, I'm old, I'm fat, my features are not appealing. But most importantly, he has rather avuncular feelings for me. And I have a strong maternal transference with a pinch of paternal thrown in. He would not find any sexual content at all titillating.
That being said, I agree with Pegasus. It seems to be a widely held therapy practice.
I do sometimes wonder if he finds gratification in my unfailing devotion. While I certainly point out his flaws, he knows that overall I adore him. And care about him. And will drive three hours to see him. Not only do I find it hard to believe that it wouldn't be gratifying, but I also think that sometimes I see glimpses of his getting comfort or something from it. Which might be my perceptions entirely, since I enjoy making the people I care about feel good. I might be seeing what I want to see.
This is the end of the thread.
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