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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by curtm on June 20, 2006, at 22:40:28
I can hardly cope from day to day. I fail at everything. Work sucks. marriage sucks. BP sucks. Everything sucks. The depression cycle has arrived. I started some Wellbutrin to try and head it off. I failed at an effort to have a good conversation about my wife's issues tonight. Totally blew that. I thought I tried pretty hard though. I just hoped for a spark to turn things around. Anything to lean on to start climbing again. Another day gone. Without a hope. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe. Shint!
Posted by sleepygirl on June 20, 2006, at 22:49:04
In reply to Losing my grip, posted by curtm on June 20, 2006, at 22:40:28
....hmmm, I doubt somehow that you fail at "everything", although I get that it does feel that way, and the whole everything sucks deal, maybe tomorrow, 'tis true indeed
hang in there curt and take it easy
((((curt))))
Posted by Tamar on June 21, 2006, at 4:49:48
In reply to Losing my grip, posted by curtm on June 20, 2006, at 22:40:28
> I failed at an effort to have a good conversation about my wife's issues tonight. Totally blew that. I thought I tried pretty hard though.
Sorry it’s hard at the moment. It’s very difficult to consider someone else’s issues when you’re depressed, isn’t it?
The fact that you are trying sounds very positive, though. Give yourself credit for that, at least!
Posted by Poet on June 21, 2006, at 8:39:10
In reply to Losing my grip, posted by curtm on June 20, 2006, at 22:40:28
Hi Curt,
I know the failure feeling well. What's good is that you are seeking someone to lean on and not step on. This includes not wanting to step on yourself, in other words not stomp yourself into the ground. That in the odd world of depression thinking I believe is a positive. It's hard for me to find positives, so I hope that makes sense.
Safe cyber hugs ((((Curt)))) and safe cyber support to hold you up.
Poet
Posted by llrrrpp on June 21, 2006, at 9:42:54
In reply to Losing my grip, posted by curtm on June 20, 2006, at 22:40:28
Hi Curt,
I'm sorry you're having trouble coping. There are still a few happy things though, not everything sucks. Can you try to give yourself a little treat to help you make it through this rough period? Can you give curt an ice cream sundae, or a nice steak dinner? Can you call up some of your buddies and do a poker night, or go fishing, or whatever guys do? Do you enjoy any athletic activities, like biking, or swimming? Can you just take a little time out, make it curt-time? Tell your family that you need to just chill out for a while. Let them know that you're in over your head. It's okay. You'll make it through this. I'm so glad you're seeing a T now, that will also help you -- even if it's just an opportunity to vent, you need the support right now.It's really hard to have difficult conversations with people you love and come out feeling good. Even if what you talked about made a difference, you might not notice the difference right away. One thing I have to do a lot with my husband (who is stubborn) is that I can't confront him directly, hoping to change his mind through persuasive argument. He just repeats himself over and over, and I get worn out, and blow up in a llrrrpp-tantrum because I'm sick of running into a brick wall.
Rather, I have a sensible idea, so I wait for a time when his guard is down and then I ever so gently plant the seed for change in his mind. And then I don't bring it up again for a while-- it works quite often. a few days/weeks later he comes to me and says: "I have an idea..." and actually "his idea" was the mature flower of the little seed that I planted.
Don't be too hard on yourself. We think you're great. You have a lot to offer. Don't beat curt up too much- we like him! I hope today is going a little better for you.
your friend,
-ll
Posted by B2chica on June 21, 2006, at 10:31:41
In reply to Re: Losing my grip » curtm, posted by llrrrpp on June 21, 2006, at 9:42:54
oh ((((((((curt)))))))))
you are so terribly hard on yourself. you do Not fail at everything.
you know right now it's hard enough trying to just deal with your own stuff. but when you are in a relationship, a whole other set of rules come into play. it's so terribly hard for communication in any relationship. but i think when you have emotional turmoil that you are trying to deal with on top of that it is especially difficult. you have to be able to keep your own emotions in tack but also allow them the time they may need to accept and understand on their own. this is a horrible time (at least it was for me). my hubby and i had constant battles that i wasn't even close to being up for. because much of the time he thought "it was all in my head" that i was making it worse than it was, that i didn't HAVE to be so sad (or anxious) if i didn't want to be. so your' dealing with the physical issues at hand but also guilt from others making you feel bad and denial from others.i don't know if these are any issues you may be dealing with. but even if they aren't. just dealing with any 'significant others' 'issues' on top of what you are going through emotionally is one h@ll of a task.
so please give yourself (and her) time. unfortunately it's the only thing that has consistantly helped me.
just hang in there curt.
i hope i made some sense.
we're here.
and i'm glad you are seeing your T.
b2c
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