Posted by llrrrpp on June 21, 2006, at 9:42:54
In reply to Losing my grip, posted by curtm on June 20, 2006, at 22:40:28
Hi Curt,
I'm sorry you're having trouble coping. There are still a few happy things though, not everything sucks. Can you try to give yourself a little treat to help you make it through this rough period? Can you give curt an ice cream sundae, or a nice steak dinner? Can you call up some of your buddies and do a poker night, or go fishing, or whatever guys do? Do you enjoy any athletic activities, like biking, or swimming? Can you just take a little time out, make it curt-time? Tell your family that you need to just chill out for a while. Let them know that you're in over your head. It's okay. You'll make it through this. I'm so glad you're seeing a T now, that will also help you -- even if it's just an opportunity to vent, you need the support right now.It's really hard to have difficult conversations with people you love and come out feeling good. Even if what you talked about made a difference, you might not notice the difference right away. One thing I have to do a lot with my husband (who is stubborn) is that I can't confront him directly, hoping to change his mind through persuasive argument. He just repeats himself over and over, and I get worn out, and blow up in a llrrrpp-tantrum because I'm sick of running into a brick wall.
Rather, I have a sensible idea, so I wait for a time when his guard is down and then I ever so gently plant the seed for change in his mind. And then I don't bring it up again for a while-- it works quite often. a few days/weeks later he comes to me and says: "I have an idea..." and actually "his idea" was the mature flower of the little seed that I planted.
Don't be too hard on yourself. We think you're great. You have a lot to offer. Don't beat curt up too much- we like him! I hope today is going a little better for you.
your friend,
-ll
poster:llrrrpp
thread:659514
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/659675.html