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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by living06 on March 23, 2006, at 18:48:49
I can not stop thinking baout my T, I am in a relationship and find it hard ot be able ot get close to the woman I am married to right now and its because of my feelings for my T, I do not know why this is and need some help possiblity in understadning this ......
Posted by orchid on March 23, 2006, at 18:56:36
In reply to cant, posted by living06 on March 23, 2006, at 18:48:49
What you are feeling is quite normal. In fact too common an occurrence in therapy. It is called transference, and you can search the archives of this board for more info on it.
I don't want to go into more details into it because of personal reasons, but others in this board are experts in helping out people with similar issues. You will find tons of help here.
Posted by All Done on March 24, 2006, at 2:35:14
In reply to cant, posted by living06 on March 23, 2006, at 18:48:49
Hi, living06.
These feelings can be so confusing. What kind of therapy are you doing with your T? If it's psychodynamic, it's probably important that you discuss your feelings with her. I know it's hard to do, but it's where all the "important stuff" is to be analyzed.
And the book "In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists" is obviously written from the female clients' perspectives, but I think it might be helpful to explain what you're experiencing, regardless of gender.
Good luck and let us know if you have any questions. Many of us have been there or are there.
Take care,
Laurie
Posted by living06 on March 24, 2006, at 4:19:58
In reply to Re: cant » living06, posted by All Done on March 24, 2006, at 2:35:14
>yes I have read the book and have been reading it .. it is my 3rd time reading it and yes she is a psychodynamic T.
I am just wondering when will these feelings stop that I have for her. It is not easy for me even the book does not take away my felings for her. it seems like they get stronger and stronger by the days. it gets to the point of tears when i do not hear from her or able to go to Therapy. i feel this is going to drive me nuts on this end, she knows how I feel about her because she even said it was transference and she is ok with it but its tearing me up inside day to day. i have been feeling this way for at least a year now, when does it end??????????
thank you
Hi, living06.
>
> These feelings can be so confusing. What kind of therapy are you doing with your T? If it's psychodynamic, it's probably important that you discuss your feelings with her. I know it's hard to do, but it's where all the "important stuff" is to be analyzed.
>
> And the book "In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists" is obviously written from the female clients' perspectives, but I think it might be helpful to explain what you're experiencing, regardless of gender.
>
> Good luck and let us know if you have any questions. Many of us have been there or are there.
>
> Take care,
> Laurie
Posted by milly on March 24, 2006, at 7:34:53
In reply to Re: cant, posted by living06 on March 24, 2006, at 4:19:58
I'm sorry to hear your pain and I can't offer any answers only to say I'm there with you.
He absorbs 98% of my waking thought and most of my unconscious thought aswell.I am married but i feel as though I am having an affair because given the choice between time with hubby or therapy I'd choose therapy everytime.
I've read the book too and although it helped a little to make me see I wasn't alone it didn't answer 'when will this go? for me either'
Sometimes I don't want it to go but mostly it is almost to painful to bare.I don't believe it is all transference (and I don't think he does either)
I might be able to answer better in a while because my therapy comes to an end in 2 weeks, not because I'm done but because the system in the UK sucks and I've had all they will pay for.
At the moment though it feels like I'm approaching the death of my dearest friend, best lover most significant other and I have no T to help with this because it is him I am losing.
Sorry I think I rambled on I meant to say I feel for you and ((((living06))))
milly
Posted by Dinah on March 24, 2006, at 9:05:07
In reply to cant, posted by living06 on March 23, 2006, at 18:48:49
At some point, perhaps you need to evaluate whether therapy with her is still helpful to you. Or if you perhaps would do better to see someone else to sort out your feelings.
I'm not saying that's the case, but it's always a possibility.
Is she helping you with this? I'm sure she wants to promote a healthy relationship with a significant other.
This is the end of the thread.
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