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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 17 to 41 of 41. Go back in thread:
Posted by muffled on February 9, 2006, at 13:09:19
In reply to Re: I can't handle anything right now » Dinah, posted by LegWarmers on February 8, 2006, at 22:53:19
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 15:52:25
In reply to (((((((((((((lw)))))))))))if ya want 'em (nm) » LegWarmers, posted by muffled on February 9, 2006, at 13:09:19
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 16:11:08
In reply to I can't handle anything right now, posted by LegWarmers on February 8, 2006, at 13:12:54
there is a monthly thing happening...
my body gets taken over by someone who really hates me, its a horrible time
thanks all, you really help me
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 17:02:44
In reply to it seems, posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 16:11:08
is that it doesnt explain my laziness and lack of motivation...or does it...
maybe I get to caught up with things and then they get too much for me
Im trying to remind myself that nothing matters, nothing is really *that* important
Posted by Susan47 on February 9, 2006, at 17:25:25
In reply to What is so annoying though, posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 17:02:44
> is that it doesnt explain my laziness and lack of motivation...or does it...
> maybe I get to caught up with things and then they get too much for me
> Im trying to remind myself that nothing matters, nothing is really *that* importantPeople are always told not to say "I know how you feel", we're taught that it's presumptuous to do that .. but .. well .. I know how you feel. :] I think you might be realizing though that being hard on yourself is cruel, you wouldn't be as hard on anyone else as you are on yourself .. and others are letting you know what they see, and it might very well be them acknowledging that you have a problem with your happiness. I mean, maybe it's not the lack of being able to take action that's the problem, that's more the symptom, and they're saying, I see the symptom .. can I help you with the problem? What IS the problem .. and you don't know, yet, but you know you're not comfortable in your skin so can't do anything because it's all too scary, the consequences are ... just scary. I've felt like that before and the feeling just grows and gets worse, unless you find a way to deal with it. I found pot .. and good friends .. knowing who friends are, what they feel like to my heart ... it's important to start with the positives, positive people will bring you happiness and the contentment, but it's finding them AND the drug AND the therapy ... Susan, you're preaching, you realize that you sound like you're preaching, do you not ???
Posted by Susan47 on February 9, 2006, at 17:26:04
In reply to it seems, posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 16:11:08
Really, really sorry everybody, I got .. chillingly carried away.
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 17:57:54
In reply to Re: What is so annoying though, posted by Susan47 on February 9, 2006, at 17:25:25
> > is that it doesnt explain my laziness and lack of motivation...or does it...
> > maybe I get to caught up with things and then they get too much for me
> > Im trying to remind myself that nothing matters, nothing is really *that* important
>
> People are always told not to say "I know how you feel", we're taught that it's presumptuous to do that .. but .. well .. I know how you feel. :] I think you might be realizing though that being hard on yourself is cruel, you wouldn't be as hard on anyone else as you are on yourself .. and others are letting you know what they see, and it might very well be them acknowledging that you have a problem with your happiness.sometimes I dont feel deserving of my happiness. It doesnt make any sense to me. Sometimes people say things to me and i don't think they intend to hurt me, but they cut very deeply. But I think it is because they are hitting my achililes (how ever you spell it) tendon
>I mean, maybe it's not the lack of being able to take action that's the problem, that's more the symptom, and they're saying, I see the symptom .. can I help you with the problem? What IS the problem .. and you don't know, yet, but you know you're not comfortable in your skin so can't do anything because it's all too scary, the consequences are ... just scary.
I think..you might have something there. I discussed some of these issues today and I think it has a lot to do with figuring out who I am. I thought I should have done that 5 or 10 years ago but Im a slow learner I suppose.
There is a lot of conflict, i don't know what to do with it>I've felt like that before and the feeling just grows and gets worse, unless you find a way to deal with it. I found pot .. and good friends .. knowing who friends are, what they feel like to my heart ... it's important to start with the positives, positive people will bring you happiness and the contentment, but it's finding them AND the drug AND the therapy ... Susan, you're preaching, you realize that you sound like you're preaching, do you not ???
>You're cute Susan! thanks for the insight. A part of me knows the problem, a part of me wants to make it disapear with an excuse, a part of me doesnt know if that really is the problem, or if its another excuse, a part of me wants to pretend that everything is wonderful and a part of me thinks IM NUTS!
Therapy...Im working on that lol My t basically told me I was lazy (reverse psychology?), it didn't go over well with me. Now its got me questioning myself about everything! I do have good friends, and I try to center myself around positive people, but when I get really down on myself for things I feel guilty, I feel guilty for feeling so bad, for feeling sorry for myself, and then I realize that Im a huge failure and oh it goes on and on... and I dont feel I am allowed to feel that way. Im crazy
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 17:59:18
In reply to Sorry, posted by Susan47 on February 9, 2006, at 17:26:04
Don't apologize
I feel understood
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 18:03:19
In reply to Re: What is so annoying though, posted by Susan47 on February 9, 2006, at 17:25:25
> can't do anything because it's all too scary, the consequences are ... just scary.
Im really scared, I had no idea
Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 19:52:45
In reply to I can't handle anything right now, posted by LegWarmers on February 8, 2006, at 13:12:54
Im about to do something that I really need to do and I have been putting it off for way too long.
if I don't do it...
Im going to give away all my shoes, and you all heard me
Posted by tryingtobewise on February 10, 2006, at 0:37:53
In reply to ok... breathe, posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 19:52:45
LegWarmers I can relate to so much of your posts. I swear I could have written your original thread-starter.
Susan, if you read this I thought your response was very eloquent and very helpful to me...and it sounds like LegWarmers too.
LegWarmers all my best to you. You aren't alone.
Kim
Posted by LegWarmers on February 10, 2006, at 9:31:13
In reply to Re: ok... breathe, posted by tryingtobewise on February 10, 2006, at 0:37:53
> LegWarmers all my best to you. You aren't alone.
>
> KimThanks Kim!
Posted by Susan47 on February 10, 2006, at 14:23:44
In reply to Re: What is so annoying though » Susan47, posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 17:57:54
> sometimes I dont feel deserving of my happiness. It doesnt make any sense to me. Sometimes people say things to me and i don't think they intend to hurt me, but they cut very deeply. But I think it is because they are hitting my achililes (how ever you spell it) tendon
>
Well when your head is full of negativity and little else, there's not much left to see the other side with, you know? So a lot of things won't make sense and WILL be hurtful because you don't know how to see things any other way. It just makes sense. It really does. It's your thinking, it's your interpretation that's a problem, not what they said. Most people really aren't into hurting anybody, it's true, it's really true, most people WANT you to like them and want to be around them. But when you're not sure about who you are, when you haven't discovered your wonderful-ness, it doesn't feel like that .. and you can't give much of your real self, not having discovered it, yet.I'm a slow learner. I'm 48 going on 49 going on what should have been, probably, 19 or so ...? Don't feel bad. Some people aren't ever lucky enough to be able to work on these things.
>
bad, for feeling sorry for myself, and then I realize that Im a huge failure and oh it goes on and on... and I dont feel I am allowed to feel that way. Im crazy
No you're not, you're totally aware of what negativity's doing to your life, and it DOES feel crazy, when you start seeing that there's something else in life, I mean, where have you BEEN all these years??? Thanks for valuing my opinion, as it is only that, and always strongly worded, in spite of my good intentions.
Posted by Susan47 on February 10, 2006, at 14:28:16
In reply to you know what? » Susan47, posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 18:03:19
and do it a couple of times, even close your eyes for a minute ... let go of all the fear, don't even think about anything that HAS to be done because you WILL do it, you know .. and the funniest thing is that once you have let go of all the no thinking, what you thought was scary won't be anymore, and it's easier than you imagined, and GUESS WHAT? IF you can't do it, you know someone who CAN or someone who can help you get it done, a friend with the necessary skills is Always always always right behind that door .. you just have to open your eyes and your mind and let go of the no thinking, there is no more "no" thinking allowed, it's all "yes" now, and imagine your life at your most powerful, the most beautiful part of you .. what is it?
I think I took too much energy tonic this morning, heeeheee.
Posted by LegWarmers on February 11, 2006, at 11:10:28
In reply to Re: What is so annoying though, posted by Susan47 on February 10, 2006, at 14:23:44
> Well when your head is full of negativity and little else, there's not much left to see the other side with, you know? So a lot of things won't make sense and WILL be hurtful because you don't know how to see things any other way. It just makes sense. It really does. It's your thinking, it's your interpretation that's a problem, not what they said. Most people really aren't into hurting anybody, it's true, it's really true, most people WANT you to like them and want to be around them.
That is so true!
> But when you're not sure about who you are, when you haven't discovered your wonderful-ness, it doesn't feel like that .. and you can't give much of your real self, not having discovered it, yet.
Yeah, I see what you mean.
> I'm a slow learner. I'm 48 going on 49 going on what should have been, probably, 19 or so ...? Don't feel bad. Some people aren't ever lucky enough to be able to work on these things.
: )
> No you're not, you're totally aware of what negativity's doing to your life, and it DOES feel crazy, when you start seeing that there's something else in life, I mean, where have you BEEN all these years??? Thanks for valuing my opinion, as it is only that, and always strongly worded, in spite of my good intentions.
i do value your opinion and I have a tendency to word strongly too, so I understand. I avoid it here as much as I can. And I always see your intentions as good.
Posted by LegWarmers on February 11, 2006, at 11:13:38
In reply to Yeah, BREATHE DEEPLY, let it out slowly, posted by Susan47 on February 10, 2006, at 14:28:16
> and do it a couple of times, even close your eyes for a minute ... let go of all the fear, don't even think about anything that HAS to be done because you WILL do it, you know .. and the funniest thing is that once you have let go of all the no thinking, what you thought was scary won't be anymore, and it's easier than you imagined, and GUESS WHAT? IF you can't do it, you know someone who CAN or someone who can help you get it done, a friend with the necessary skills is Always always always right behind that door .. you just have to open your eyes and your mind and let go of the no thinking, there is no more "no" thinking allowed, it's all "yes" now, and imagine your life at your most powerful, the most beautiful part of you .. what is it?
> I think I took too much energy tonic this morning, heeeheee.LOL Id like some of that tonic!! Actually that is what I need sometimes, to be reminded to breathe slowly.
Thanks
Posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 9:39:57
In reply to Re: Yeah, BREATHE DEEPLY, let it out slowly » Susan47, posted by LegWarmers on February 11, 2006, at 11:13:38
Im just wondering if I can keep my cool today, we'll see
I did something I feel really bad about it. I feel so awful about it. Doesn't matter whats done is done right? Right! Well not exactly, I could try to fix it, but I don't want to.
Posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 15:16:16
In reply to just venting, posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 9:39:57
Maybe I need to hear it over and over again how lazy I am. Maybe the potential others saw in me scared me or the pressure I feel and so now I don't want to do anything? Maybe I want people to think Im lazy so they stop expecting things from me?
Can anyone relate to that thought?? Im really thinking on this a lot!
Posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 15:34:18
In reply to Re: just venting some more, posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 15:16:16
no longer seems to make sense to me, It must just be in my brain
Posted by Susan47 on February 13, 2006, at 19:46:18
In reply to just venting, posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 9:39:57
I'm just editing putting this together...
Im just wondering if I can keep my cool today, we'll see
> I did something I feel really bad about it. I feel so awful about it. Doesn't matter whats done is done right? Right! Well not exactly, I could try to fix it, but I don't want to.
Maybe I need to hear it over and over again how lazy I am. Maybe the potential others saw in me scared me or the pressure I feel and so now I don't want to do anything? Maybe I want people to think Im lazy so they stop expecting things from me?Can anyone relate to that thought?? Im really thinking on this a lot!
Okay, and you're not whatever you thought, was it crazy or something? My mind is mush, absolute mush right now. But ... yeah. Anxious, expectations, can't do it, can't do it, WON'T do it because I'm alone, no matter what I do, I'm not with the person I want to be with most, but there really isn't such a person, so why do I feel this way? Religious types would think I'm longing for god, or some such thing .. but I'm not religious, unfortunately, not in the least .. although can Life be a religion? I mean, can you live it as though it were the Only Thing? There's so much pressure, so much and I just cannot, CANNOT handle it ... that's me anyway. It looks lazy on the outside, it's anxious on the inside. Very, unbelievably anxious, physical pain anxious ... we need a lot of friends, we need friends who can Do Things to help us be and do better, and I hope you find the right people, there's people who you can click with .. like a lock and key .. you know, they're your friends but helpers, too. (((Legwarmers))) It'll get better, but expect less of yourself while you're realizing what's going on, don't stress about this, just accept what is, for now. Maybe it's just realizing there's no boogey-man ... I don't know. I don't know.
Posted by Susan47 on February 13, 2006, at 19:47:02
In reply to That idea, posted by LegWarmers on February 12, 2006, at 15:34:18
> no longer seems to make sense to me, It must just be in my brain
There.
That's it.
It's not just in your brain.
It's in mine, too. :) :(
Posted by LegWarmers on February 14, 2006, at 16:11:45
In reply to Re: just venting » LegWarmers, posted by Susan47 on February 13, 2006, at 19:46:18
> I'm just editing putting this together...
> Im just wondering if I can keep my cool today, we'll see
> > I did something I feel really bad about it. I feel so awful about it. Doesn't matter whats done is done right? Right! Well not exactly, I could try to fix it, but I don't want to.
> Maybe I need to hear it over and over again how lazy I am. Maybe the potential others saw in me scared me or the pressure I feel and so now I don't want to do anything? Maybe I want people to think Im lazy so they stop expecting things from me?
>
> Can anyone relate to that thought?? Im really thinking on this a lot!
>
> Okay, and you're not whatever you thought, was it crazy or something? My mind is mush, absolute mush right now. But ... yeah. Anxious, expectations, can't do it, can't do it, WON'T do it because I'm alone, no matter what I do, I'm not with the person I want to be with most, but there really isn't such a person, so why do I feel this way? Religious types would think I'm longing for god, or some such thing .. but I'm not religious, unfortunately, not in the least .. although can Life be a religion? I mean, can you live it as though it were the Only Thing? There's so much pressure, so much and I just cannot, CANNOT handle it ... that's me anyway.Sounds like me too, I hate pressure...I hate it so much
>> It looks lazy on the outside, it's anxious on the inside. Very, unbelievably anxious, physical pain anxious ...
Thats what Ive been feeling, physically uncomfortable.>> we need a lot of friends, we need friends who can Do Things to help us be and do better, and I hope you find the right people, there's people who you can click with .. like a lock and key .. you know, they're your friends but helpers, too. (((Legwarmers))) It'll get better, but expect less of yourself while you're realizing what's going on, don't stress about this, just accept what is, for now. Maybe it's just realizing there's no boogey-man ... I don't know. I don't know.
Thanks Susan.... you mean there is no boogeyman? I think...you are right . it is about realizing things....realizing our potential, realizing what we want, and what we are willing to give to get it, and realizing that being happy is even more important than being happy for others' happiness. Now... if I could just apply that.
; )
Posted by LegWarmers on February 14, 2006, at 16:12:38
In reply to Re: That idea, posted by Susan47 on February 13, 2006, at 19:47:02
> > no longer seems to make sense to me, It must just be in my brain
> There.
> That's it.
> It's not just in your brain.
> It's in mine, too. :) :(: D
Posted by Susan47 on February 14, 2006, at 19:33:47
In reply to Re: just venting » Susan47, posted by LegWarmers on February 14, 2006, at 16:11:45
> Thanks Susan.... you mean there is no boogeyman? I think...you are right . it is about realizing things....realizing our potential, realizing what we want, and what we are willing to give to get it, and realizing that being happy is even more important than being happy for others' happiness. Now... if I could just apply that.
> ; )
Hmh. I've never been happy for others' happiness. I've always been envious of it. Trying to steer clear of happy people, because it made my own unhappiness more unbearable. But then being around unhappy people, although sometimes it seems like the only thing left besides alone, is worse. Worse. Not worth it. Not a life I want. But the boogeyman? It's us. It's just inside us. Not out there, not under the bed, behind the shower curtain, in the mirror..
Posted by LegWarmers on February 14, 2006, at 20:25:41
In reply to Re: just venting, posted by Susan47 on February 14, 2006, at 19:33:47
>
> > Thanks Susan.... you mean there is no boogeyman? I think...you are right . it is about realizing things....realizing our potential, realizing what we want, and what we are willing to give to get it, and realizing that being happy is even more important than being happy for others' happiness. Now... if I could just apply that.
> > ; )
> Hmh. I've never been happy for others' happiness. I've always been envious of it.
Trying to steer clear of happy people, because it made my own unhappiness more unbearable. But then being around unhappy people, although sometimes it seems like the only thing left besides alone, is worse. Worse. Not worth it. Not a life I want.I like happy people, im a happy person.... most of the time lol unless Im unhappy ; ) but I dont enjoy people who are forced happy... thats just annoying...and sad. i like to see people happy, I hate to see people hurt
> But the boogeyman? It's us. It's just inside us. Not out there, not under the bed, behind the shower curtain, in the mirror..
In the mirror lol, have you ever woken up in the morning and thought your hair looks better after being slept on lol... when I do, I dont brush it. I love bed head : )
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