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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
I’m really sorry I haven’t been more supportive and stuff recently. I just don’t know what to say in response to anything. There are so many threads that I’ve wanted to post to and I try to post but can’t seem to find the right words. Sorry I’m so cr*p.
I seem to be quite depressed again. I am going to do something about it, but I don’t know exactly what to do… One part of me wants to go back to my therapist and another part of me wants to try meds instead. Meds would be easier, for sure (as long as they don’t interfere with my insulin). I have so much work to do in the next six months that I really need to find the easiest way to get it done without too much interference in my mind. Or maybe I’m still trying to avoid my therapist…
Any advice gratefully received…
Tamar
Posted by orchid on November 17, 2005, at 8:38:57
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
You have no reason to apologize.
You have been wonderfully supportive to everyone. In fact you have given me as much guidance and support as my therapists have given me. Perhaps even more. I am sure everyone of us feels very indebted to you.
Can you think of any reason why there is a tendency to get depressed now? If you go back to your old T, do you think it would help you? Can you work through your transference towards him and still get your work done? Or would you rather just rely on meds for now and leave the therapy work for later? I am not sure what kind of work you need to do and if therapy will interfere with your work, so I don't know what to suggest.
As to not knowing what words to say, I have also been in the same boat for some time now. I read threads but many times just seem to go blank as to what to say. Perhaps it happens that way after a while because we run out of ideas also. I feel I have pretty much said everything I know in some thread or the other many times. So sometimes I feel there is nothing new for me to say. Perhaps you are feeling something like that.
((Tamar))
Posted by antigua on November 17, 2005, at 9:25:31
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
Please don't feel like you have to apologize. We've all been there. Maybe you could try therapy and meds? I find that either one doesn't work as well w/o the other.
I'm sorry you're depressed.
take care,
antigua
Posted by caraher on November 17, 2005, at 9:41:49
In reply to Re: Apologies and questions, posted by antigua on November 17, 2005, at 9:25:31
> Please don't feel like you have to apologize. We've all been there. Maybe you could try therapy and meds? I find that either one doesn't work as well w/o the other.
> I'm sorry you're depressed.
> take care,
> antiguaI agree. I think therapy and meds can work in different, complementary ways. My T pushed me to resume meds on the theory that you can work more effectively on therapy that way. I recall reading a story about imaging studies that showed therapy seems to affect different parts of the brain.
Meanwhile don't worry yourself about the level of your Babble participation. You could scarcely expect to maintain your "all-star" pace of helpful posts indefinitely, and you're under no obligation to post any more often than you feel like posting.
I hope you can nip this round of depression in the bud!
Posted by happyflower on November 17, 2005, at 9:46:27
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
First of all you are not cr*p, you are wonderful! I have read some of my old posts and you were there supporting me even when I didn't even know who you were.
Second of all, just go and see your T. I have been thinking about some of your posts over the last couple of weeks. It seems like you are trying to white nuckle everything. I think you want to talk to your T , you should do it and don't feel bad about it either. Maybe you just need a few sessions. Just call him, okay? Keep posting, it is our turn to give you some of that support you have given to all of us. ((((((Tamar))))) Keep in touch! :)
Posted by muffled on November 17, 2005, at 10:31:06
In reply to ((((((((((TAMAR)))))))))))))))))))), posted by happyflower on November 17, 2005, at 9:46:27
> First of all you are not cr*p, you are wonderful! I have read some of my old posts and you were there supporting me even when I didn't even know who you were.
> Second of all, just go and see your T. I have been thinking about some of your posts over the last couple of weeks. It seems like you are trying to white nuckle everything. I think you want to talk to your T , you should do it and don't feel bad about it either. Maybe you just need a few sessions. Just call him, okay? Keep posting, it is our turn to give you some of that support you have given to all of us. ((((((Tamar))))) Keep in touch! :)*Tamar, I agree with happy. Thank you for the big help you have been to me. I have to run right now, just caught this thread and wanted to reply, if quickly. I have a T. appt. I DREAD this A.M. But at least I'm learning all the time.
(((((Tamar))))
Muffled
Posted by cricket on November 17, 2005, at 11:49:09
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
Oh Tamar. I am so sorry to hear you're not feeling great.
I sent you a babblemail last week. Did you get it?
Could it be a seasonal thing? I don't know where you are but it's so dark and dreary at this time of year in the Northeast.
I think you should maybe call your therapist first before meds. I know that must be hard. Does it make it any easier because you feel like you are in real need? Or does that make it harder?
I am glad you're asking for help here. It sounds like that may be the first step.
((((((Tamar))))))))
Posted by Dinah on November 17, 2005, at 19:25:17
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
No need to apologize! That's the nature of this board, and you have contributed wonderfully and will again when you can.
I'd agree that meds and therapy aren't an either/or. Medications can be helpful to give a base so that you can work on therapy. Perhaps therapy can help you figure out triggers. Did something happen recently to bring back these feelings? Does it generally come at the same time of year?
If you're aggressive about treating it early, perhaps you'll be able to get all that work done. (Blech. I hate deadlines.)
((((Tamar))))
Posted by annierose on November 17, 2005, at 19:42:26
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
Sorry you are going through another rough patch. I get the feeling that something is holding you back from contacting your former T. You really liked him, felt he was helpful, so what is preventing you from calling him? It's not failure on your part. Our lives constantly change. Stuff happens. Heck, I've been at this for close to two years and I think I'll be there for at least another year. It's not a fast process.
And I agree with everyone else. You are always generous with your thoughts and wisdom on this board. You think deeply, and I like that about you. I just want you feeling better. And if a combination of medication w/therapy will help, then I'm all for that.
I'm glad you reached out to us today. Try to reach out to your T too.
Posted by 10derHeart on November 17, 2005, at 21:55:54
In reply to Re: Apologies and questions, posted by annierose on November 17, 2005, at 19:42:26
I echo what everyone else has said. You have nothing to apologize for at all. You must always take care of yourself first, whatever that takes.
I know we can't decide for you, but I guess I'm leaning heavily toward you calling your T. At least maybe just call him, and go see him at least once, to see how that seems? Maybe you could speak on the phone about what you think you'd like to get out of resuming therapy with him, and see where he stands.
Then again, I know you had some painful transference, too. I suppose it would have to be a balance between tolerating more of that and the benefit you'd get out of therapy. Only you can know....and it probably doesn't look too clear to you either. It stinks we have to make decisions about helping our depression when we're depressed and not really up to making decisions! Grrr.
I personally think talking to a T. on a regular basis again might help a lot. I wonder if you're in some sort of pattern of highs and lows and just can't see some of the triggers without help. Or if just stuffing a lot of things inside and "soldiering on," so to speak, has been taking its toll.
Or I'm just way off. But something tells me talking to more than Babblers would really release some things and then lessen the depression.
I pray you feel better as soon as possible.
Posted by Damos on November 17, 2005, at 22:22:29
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
Hey Tamar,
Sorry that you're feeling so down. Come here you silly billy ((((((((((Tamar)))))))))). Cr*p maybe how you're feeling, but it's so not who you are. Gosh, if only you knew how much I admire you for all you do here, and how proud I am to know you.
Just want you to be okay darling girl. You just make the best choice for you for how you're feeling right now. If it's more important right now to get through the next six months than it is to resolve the stuff around therapy and this particular T - that's okay. Whatever you choose, meds or T or meds and T we're here okay.
Thinking of you,
Damos
Posted by Tamar on November 18, 2005, at 20:00:30
In reply to Apologies and questions, posted by Tamar on November 17, 2005, at 7:56:26
Your replies mean so much to me.
I'll reply properly tomorrow when I have some time to engage my emotions.
But I'm so glad of your support. You guys are the best!
Tamar
Posted by muffled on November 18, 2005, at 20:03:06
In reply to Thanks so much everyone, posted by Tamar on November 18, 2005, at 20:00:30
This is the end of the thread.
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