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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 1:39:01
I drink alcohol and use cocaine. I then feel very depressed and irritible afterwrads, even suicidal. I use to fit in socially with a group of idiots I have nothing at all in common with.
Then I stop for 2-3 weeks and in 10-14 days my depression lifts fairly reliably, however I experience tremendous anxiety or what might even be mixed episodes.
My circadian rhythyms get all messed up and I want to sleep all day and stay awake all night while in this sober period...then I finally break down while anxious, restless, self-destructively inclined and maybe even hypomanic and do the drugs and alcohol again.
I don't want to live my life this way anymore. I don't want to spend another day feeling depressed because of the drugs and alcohol, but I think I used them to deal with hypomania??!! Maybe I'm just a drug addict.
What should I do? I'm thinking about checking in to rehab. It worked last time for many years until I relapsed again 1.5 years ago.What do you think?
Posted by Robin.d.j on August 19, 2002, at 5:03:27
In reply to Probable Bipolar drug addict seeks advice , posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 1:39:01
As a recovering addict 2 years now...any straight time is good time ...even in a rehab..dont think twice , if you can make ends meet with outside responsibilities...good luck
Posted by Ritch on August 19, 2002, at 10:14:01
In reply to Probable Bipolar drug addict seeks advice , posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 1:39:01
>
> I drink alcohol and use cocaine. I then feel very depressed and irritible afterwrads, even suicidal. I use to fit in socially with a group of idiots I have nothing at all in common with.
> Then I stop for 2-3 weeks and in 10-14 days my depression lifts fairly reliably, however I experience tremendous anxiety or what might even be mixed episodes.
> My circadian rhythyms get all messed up and I want to sleep all day and stay awake all night while in this sober period...then I finally break down while anxious, restless, self-destructively inclined and maybe even hypomanic and do the drugs and alcohol again.
> I don't want to live my life this way anymore. I don't want to spend another day feeling depressed because of the drugs and alcohol, but I think I used them to deal with hypomania??!! Maybe I'm just a drug addict.
> What should I do? I'm thinking about checking in to rehab. It worked last time for many years until I relapsed again 1.5 years ago.
>
> What do you think?
Scott,If you are wanting to "rule out" a bipolar diagnosis you would have to be off the coke and booze long enough to see if your cycling would fade away. Did your mood problems fade away when you got clean the last time? If so, your bipolar symptoms are being induced by the substances. If you still experienced hypomanias despite being clean-well you have got BP for sure. Coke and booze, that is the "Dennis Hopper" combo. I recall an interview on NPR about 10 years ago (after he got clean), he was doing coke to feel good, and then he would get all wired out on the coke and would drink to calm down. Booze hoses up your sleep big time. Then it sets up its own withdrawal. Sleep all day-stay awake all nite, that in itself can do you in (drugs or not). Is there any way possible you can stop the coke and taper the booze away, so you don't yo-yo your system? If not, rehab. is your best option.
Mitch
Posted by judy1 on August 19, 2002, at 10:48:37
In reply to Probable Bipolar drug addict seeks advice , posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 1:39:01
Those are the drugs of a self-medicating bipolar (I should know, did them for years). I suspect you have bipolar disorder, but you won't get a diagnosis until you're 'clean'. When I was put on depakote, I found it fairly easy to stop drinking (not so much the coke)- maybe you can talk to a shrink about that? Take care and best of luck, judy
Posted by fuji on August 19, 2002, at 12:20:14
In reply to Probable Bipolar drug addict seeks advice , posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 1:39:01
I think you answered your own question and as a recovering addict I did not know how screwed up I was until I was sober for quite some time. As far as I am concerned, addiction is all about self-medicating because we feel so lousy and want to at least feel normal if not better. My last combo before I got sober was meth & alcohol. I gave up the alcohol and then 3 months later gave up the meth.
Good luck no matter what you decide to do.
Posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 20:48:40
In reply to Re: Probable Bipolar drug addict seeks advice » Mr.Scott, posted by judy1 on August 19, 2002, at 10:48:37
Thanks for responding earlier to this thread.I was clean for 5 years, but not in a 12 step group. Then I broke with with my support system (girlfriend) and started going out with my old friends who enjoy life in the fast lane. Whats odd is that they don't experience anything like the degree of illness I do when I use. I don't even like the feeling I get, I just do it because thats what my friends do!
I think I need new friends (I have a few who don't mess with that stuff but not many!) So lonely though!. I tend to be slightly hypomanic with a touch of mixed here and there with lots of anxiety when sober for a few weeks. And then I get a call to hang out and I go and I feel all uncomfortable socially and without anything in common, and boom! I do a little coke and then have a few beers, and somehow that morphs into a 24 hour binge with 7-10 days of hell afterwards.
Scott
Posted by judy1 on August 19, 2002, at 22:07:02
In reply to probable bipolar addict , posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 20:48:40
Oh do I ever empathize with you. Breaking up with a significant other is really difficult, do you have a therapist? If not, I strongly suggest getting one to not only help you through this but also to see your self-destructive impulses by hanging out with friends who get into that life-style. It's got to be your call though, or else it won't work. take care, judy
Posted by Linkadge on August 20, 2002, at 9:53:26
In reply to Re: probable bipolar addict » Mr.Scott, posted by judy1 on August 19, 2002, at 22:07:02
I know where you are coming from
and I can see that you really
do need some help. If you can
get yourself clean again, with or
without support, then do it.After you are clean, then go
get medical help. My friend was
a depressive, who resorted to the
same self medication. After he
was diagnosed and treated properly,
he never returned to his old lifestyle.You may feel good on cocane but it takes
its tole on your system. Get the help
now while you still have controll, or you
might not be alive to do it later.
Good luckLinkadge
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