Posted by Mr.Scott on August 19, 2002, at 1:39:01
I drink alcohol and use cocaine. I then feel very depressed and irritible afterwrads, even suicidal. I use to fit in socially with a group of idiots I have nothing at all in common with.
Then I stop for 2-3 weeks and in 10-14 days my depression lifts fairly reliably, however I experience tremendous anxiety or what might even be mixed episodes.
My circadian rhythyms get all messed up and I want to sleep all day and stay awake all night while in this sober period...then I finally break down while anxious, restless, self-destructively inclined and maybe even hypomanic and do the drugs and alcohol again.
I don't want to live my life this way anymore. I don't want to spend another day feeling depressed because of the drugs and alcohol, but I think I used them to deal with hypomania??!! Maybe I'm just a drug addict.
What should I do? I'm thinking about checking in to rehab. It worked last time for many years until I relapsed again 1.5 years ago.What do you think?
poster:Mr.Scott
thread:116891
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020814/msgs/116891.html