![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
I saw a neurologist today. I've been having intermittent and at times very acute episodes of pain to one side of my face since Dec. In search of an explanation, I've been to an internist, an EMT guy, an allergist, been treated with 2 different courses of antibiotics and had 2 different CT scans all to pretty much no avail. The neurologist was the EMT guy's idea, but the neurologist couldn't figure out much either (he thought it was a sinus problem altho that avenue has been explored pretty thoroughly). The upshot was that he decided I should just be treated for facial pain of undetermined origin which, he claimed was not an unusual by product of depression. (news to me) He's prescribed small doses of elavil which, I guess is supposed to increase my pain threshhold. When I realized that he was pretty stumped I found myself pushing the idea myself that it was all stress/depression related, which is sort of my answer to everything. I despise having to relate my medical mental health history, and this time was no exception. I just came away from this appointment unbelievably depressed - that I had to let one other person know about my depression, that this sould bother me at all, that there are so many physical conditions that are too readily passed off as depression related, that I'm going to start taking another med which will do nothing to address a root cause, that all this is happening at a time when I was in the process of switching some meds and has disrupted plans somewhat, that because of this the neurologist had to talk with my pdoc, that both of them were questioned by my pharmacist who was curious about these prescriptions being called in in such a short period of time, and most of all, that I'm dealing with everything so miserably. I'm sure this sounds pretty rambling. The neurologist's office is in a hospital. I could see tons of people all around me dealing with really horrible stuff, so I feel like I have no reason to be depressed - but I get worn down by thinking of myself as a person with a disease (particularly one that shames me so much that I hate talking about it even to doctors) I make myself feel like I'm wearing a scarlett letter or something. This post probably seems pretty incoherent (and feels very inconsequential) but I hoped it would distract me from lying aroung thinking about hurting myself, which is pretty much what I've been doing. It doesn't require a response.
Posted by dj on August 1, 2000, at 20:22:26
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
It's tough going sometimes and making sense of, when it all seems to make no sense, though I sense your pain and wish I could help. Hang in there!!
Check out Janice's post above Re: What's With This Anyway, Damn! Janice 8/1/00 for a perspective that may help.
Sante!
dj
Posted by Janice on August 1, 2000, at 21:28:42
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
I can relate. I try to talk about it as little as possible, and when I do I am usually thinking, ' who the hell is this nut I'm talking about?' I hate that feeling of being out-there, vunerable loose in the system.
I only talk about it to my psychiatrist and here at PB, but there certainly have been times in my life where I've had to talk about it in places where I didn't want to, to people I didn't want to share it with.
the worst time to have to do this is when you are actually suffering from the illness, and feeling extremely vunerable. I'm sorry you had to experience this today. It always took me a few days to recover from this kind of stuff.
I've made a policy for myself to talk about it as little as possible. I don't tell anyone except when I absolutely must - like your situation today. Sorry again.
Janice
ps you have no reason to feel depressed, I have no reason to feel good (but I do). It's not your fault, it's not my fault.
Posted by Cindy W on August 1, 2000, at 22:23:17
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression, posted by Janice on August 1, 2000, at 21:28:42
> I can relate. I try to talk about it as little as possible, and when I do I am usually thinking, ' who the hell is this nut I'm talking about?' I hate that feeling of being out-there, vunerable loose in the system.
>
> I only talk about it to my psychiatrist and here at PB, but there certainly have been times in my life where I've had to talk about it in places where I didn't want to, to people I didn't want to share it with.
>
> the worst time to have to do this is when you are actually suffering from the illness, and feeling extremely vunerable. I'm sorry you had to experience this today. It always took me a few days to recover from this kind of stuff.
>
> I've made a policy for myself to talk about it as little as possible. I don't tell anyone except when I absolutely must - like your situation today. Sorry again.
>
> Janice
>
> ps you have no reason to feel depressed, I have no reason to feel good (but I do). It's not your fault, it's not my fault.
ksvt, I can relate, too. I feel especially ashamed today, because I just can't take any action to change the things I need to change in my life. It's hard enough to get out of bed in the morning, go to work, and make it through the day. After work, I do a few errands, feed my pets, and lie in bed trying to sleep (with varying success). I feel so ashamed that I'm not all better yet, after taking Effexor-XR and working with a pdoc for almost a year. Today was the first time in a long time I thought about suicide, too, although I won't do it. Hang in there and I'll try to do the same!
Posted by Nibor on August 1, 2000, at 22:54:42
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
> I saw a neurologist today. I've been having intermittent and at times very acute episodes of pain to one side of my face since Dec. In search of an explanation, I've been to an internist, an EMT guy, an allergist, been treated with 2 different courses of antibiotics and had 2 different CT scans all to pretty much no avail. The neurologist was the EMT guy's idea, but the neurologist couldn't figure out much either (he thought it was a sinus problem altho that avenue has been explored pretty thoroughly). The upshot was that he decided I should just be treated for facial pain of undetermined origin which, he claimed was not an unusual by product of depression. (news to me) He's prescribed small doses of elavil which, I guess is supposed to increase my pain threshhold. When I realized that he was pretty stumped I found myself pushing the idea myself that it was all stress/depression related, which is sort of my answer to everything. I despise having to relate my medical mental health history, and this time was no exception. I just came away from this appointment unbelievably depressed - that I had to let one other person know about my depression, that this sould bother me at all, that there are so many physical conditions that are too readily passed off as depression related, that I'm going to start taking another med which will do nothing to address a root cause, that all this is happening at a time when I was in the process of switching some meds and has disrupted plans somewhat, that because of this the neurologist had to talk with my pdoc, that both of them were questioned by my pharmacist who was curious about these prescriptions being called in in such a short period of time, and most of all, that I'm dealing with everything so miserably. I'm sure this sounds pretty rambling. The neurologist's office is in a hospital. I could see tons of people all around me dealing with really horrible stuff, so I feel like I have no reason to be depressed - but I get worn down by thinking of myself as a person with a disease (particularly one that shames me so much that I hate talking about it even to doctors) I make myself feel like I'm wearing a scarlett letter or something. This post probably seems pretty incoherent (and feels very inconsequential) but I hoped it would distract me from lying aroung thinking about hurting myself, which is pretty much what I've been doing. It doesn't require a response.
I am sorry you are having so much physical pain, and it's especially tough when the MDs can't pinpoint the problem. I wish I had some way to help.
There are many painful conditions that are difficult to find a cause for--like fibromyalgia, migraines, TMJ, chronic back pain, chronic fatigue syndrome. Don't let anyone make you feel bad just because they THINK it's "all in your head." Even if it is, it still hurts. Why should you have to feel shame because of that.
Sometimes people have surgeries because of back pain; apparently if you X-rayed almost anyone's back, there would be some kind of disc abnormality. So if you are in pain, the surgeon wants to surge, then you are sometimes in more pain after because that wasn't what was really causing the pain. I know this happens because it went that way for my husband. Now he tries to just live with it--excercise, pain killers sometimes, massage, relaxation techniques, he tries lots of different things--it isn't easy and it can get him down (he suffers with depression, after all), but he keeps working at it. And some days something works, then the next day it doesn't. But that's the way it is for now and on most days he is determined not to let it stop what he wants to do.
I hope you find some things that work for
you; keep trying till you find a few.
Nibor
Posted by shar on August 2, 2000, at 1:19:58
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
I wish I had a language that could take away coatings of shame, and pain, and anguish from people, and let them see the good person underneath, the person who deserves peace and happiness. I hope so much that you will feel better soon, don't forget to breathe, remember to eat, and rest.
I will be sending you good thoughts, and healing energy.
Now, here is my facial pain story, and it would be a happy serendipity if it helps you! I was experiencing what you described, for about a year, and then the pain was no longer episodic. I was in horrible, constant pain in the area of the sinus on the right side of my face.
I went to my regular doc, she figured sinus infection, and we did antibiotics. We did some more when that didn't help. I finally went to an ENT guy, he looked and looked, couldn't find anything, and gave me some pain meds. Later in time I ended up in an emergency med center coming out with a stronger antibiotic and more pain meds.
It so happened that I had a dentist appt. around then, and my dentist said she believed I had some decay under a bridge on the upper right of my mouth (in the back). This was a permanent bridge so I hated messing with it, but she pried it off, and lo and behold there was quite a bit of decay. And inflamation. And the teeth are very close to the sinuses, and...yep, I had one tooth extracted (the decayed one) and my relief was almost instantaneous.
Many times when people do have sinus problems they will report that their teeth hurt. Or go see the dentist because of that. I did not have a toothache, my pain was definitely located in my face where the sinuses were.
So, I would have never thought "dentist" for that pain. But, maybe you can go over in your mind about your last visit to the dentist, etc. It may not be that you have any tooth problem (wisdom teeth?), but it's something to think about.
Best of luck to you, and hang in there!
Shar
> I saw a neurologist today. I've been having intermittent and at times very acute episodes of pain to one side of my face since Dec. In search of an explanation, I've been to an internist, an EMT guy, an allergist, been treated with 2 different courses of antibiotics and had 2 different CT scans all to pretty much no avail. The neurologist was the EMT guy's idea, but the neurologist couldn't figure out much either (he thought it was a sinus problem altho that avenue has been explored pretty thoroughly). The upshot was that he decided I should just be treated for facial pain of undetermined origin which, he claimed was not an unusual by product of depression. (news to me) He's prescribed small doses of elavil which, I guess is supposed to increase my pain threshhold. When I realized that he was pretty stumped I found myself pushing the idea myself that it was all stress/depression related, which is sort of my answer to everything. I despise having to relate my medical mental health history, and this time was no exception. I just came away from this appointment unbelievably depressed - that I had to let one other person know about my depression, that this sould bother me at all, that there are so many physical conditions that are too readily passed off as depression related, that I'm going to start taking another med which will do nothing to address a root cause, that all this is happening at a time when I was in the process of switching some meds and has disrupted plans somewhat, that because of this the neurologist had to talk with my pdoc, that both of them were questioned by my pharmacist who was curious about these prescriptions being called in in such a short period of time, and most of all, that I'm dealing with everything so miserably. I'm sure this sounds pretty rambling. The neurologist's office is in a hospital. I could see tons of people all around me dealing with really horrible stuff, so I feel like I have no reason to be depressed - but I get worn down by thinking of myself as a person with a disease (particularly one that shames me so much that I hate talking about it even to doctors) I make myself feel like I'm wearing a scarlett letter or something. This post probably seems pretty incoherent (and feels very inconsequential) but I hoped it would distract me from lying aroung thinking about hurting myself, which is pretty much what I've been doing. It doesn't require a response.
Posted by ksvt on August 2, 2000, at 3:55:23
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression » ksvt, posted by shar on August 2, 2000, at 1:19:58
> I wish I had a language that could take away coatings of shame, and pain, and anguish from people, and let them see the good person underneath, the person who deserves peace and happiness. I hope so much that you will feel better soon, don't forget to breathe, remember to eat, and rest.
>
> I will be sending you good thoughts, and healing energy.
>
> Now, here is my facial pain story, and it would be a happy serendipity if it helps you! I was experiencing what you described, for about a year, and then the pain was no longer episodic. I was in horrible, constant pain in the area of the sinus on the right side of my face.
>
> I went to my regular doc, she figured sinus infection, and we did antibiotics. We did some more when that didn't help. I finally went to an ENT guy, he looked and looked, couldn't find anything, and gave me some pain meds. Later in time I ended up in an emergency med center coming out with a stronger antibiotic and more pain meds.
>
> It so happened that I had a dentist appt. around then, and my dentist said she believed I had some decay under a bridge on the upper right of my mouth (in the back). This was a permanent bridge so I hated messing with it, but she pried it off, and lo and behold there was quite a bit of decay. And inflamation. And the teeth are very close to the sinuses, and...yep, I had one tooth extracted (the decayed one) and my relief was almost instantaneous.
>
> Many times when people do have sinus problems they will report that their teeth hurt. Or go see the dentist because of that. I did not have a toothache, my pain was definitely located in my face where the sinuses were.
>
> So, I would have never thought "dentist" for that pain. But, maybe you can go over in your mind about your last visit to the dentist, etc. It may not be that you have any tooth problem (wisdom teeth?), but it's something to think about.
>
> Best of luck to you, and hang in there!
> Shar
>
>
> > I saw a neurologist today. I've been having intermittent and at times very acute episodes of pain to one side of my face since Dec. In search of an explanation, I've been to an internist, an EMT guy, an allergist, been treated with 2 different courses of antibiotics and had 2 different CT scans all to pretty much no avail. The neurologist was the EMT guy's idea, but the neurologist couldn't figure out much either (he thought it was a sinus problem altho that avenue has been explored pretty thoroughly). The upshot was that he decided I should just be treated for facial pain of undetermined origin which, he claimed was not an unusual by product of depression. (news to me) He's prescribed small doses of elavil which, I guess is supposed to increase my pain threshhold. When I realized that he was pretty stumped I found myself pushing the idea myself that it was all stress/depression related, which is sort of my answer to everything. I despise having to relate my medical mental health history, and this time was no exception. I just came away from this appointment unbelievably depressed - that I had to let one other person know about my depression, that this sould bother me at all, that there are so many physical conditions that are too readily passed off as depression related, that I'm going to start taking another med which will do nothing to address a root cause, that all this is happening at a time when I was in the process of switching some meds and has disrupted plans somewhat, that because of this the neurologist had to talk with my pdoc, that both of them were questioned by my pharmacist who was curious about these prescriptions being called in in such a short period of time, and most of all, that I'm dealing with everything so miserably. I'm sure this sounds pretty rambling. The neurologist's office is in a hospital. I could see tons of people all around me dealing with really horrible stuff, so I feel like I have no reason to be depressed - but I get worn down by thinking of myself as a person with a disease (particularly one that shames me so much that I hate talking about it even to doctors) I make myself feel like I'm wearing a scarlett letter or something. This post probably seems pretty incoherent (and feels very inconsequential) but I hoped it would distract me from lying aroung thinking about hurting myself, which is pretty much what I've been doing. It doesn't require a response.Thanks everyone - I felt better for having sent the post and definitely better reading your kind responses. There are all kinds of situations where you have to reveal at least some medical history. No self respecting dentist, eye doc, etc will treat you without minimally asking about current medications. I think this encounter yesterday was a bit worse because I live in a pretty small area and the neurologist lives on the periphery of my neighborhood, and while we didn't really know each other (perhaps by sight) we certainly knew about one another in the way that frequently happens in smaller towns. Also, it's kind of like Janice said, you hear yourself talking and feel like you're really describing someone whose a mess. I may feel like a mess, lots of times, but I work very hard (too hard) to disguise that. Very few of my family even and my friends know anything about my depression altho it's been an immense part of my life for the last several years. Nibor and Shar - the neurologist does want me to get checked out by my dentist for TMJ altho he thinks that even if I have it, it would not fully explain what's been going on. I'll check to make sure it's not some sort of a tooth problem at the same time; I've always discounted that as a possibility since I had a set of full mouth xrays not real long before all this started. Until recently, I had the most wonderful internist - she was the one person whom I minded least that she knew of my "other" life. I'd go in for an annual physical, and when I'd acknowledge upfront that whatever symptom I was reporting could be depression manifests itself in so many symptoms that are similar to the symptoms of other conditions, she'd say something like "you're absolutely right and that's why it's so important to look at each one of these carefully to make sure that it is or is not depression related." I never felt stigmatized. Alas, she made the wise personal decision to take a few years off. Thanks again - ksvt
Posted by CarolAnn on August 2, 2000, at 8:39:04
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 2, 2000, at 3:55:23
Dear ksvt, I spent yrs being ashamed of my depression to the point that I wasted a lot of time before getting help. The thing that helped me let go of the shame is this: Depression is a disease, just like Diabetes is a disease. No one would ever tell a Diabetic to just,"snap out of it", and no Diabetic would think that they should be "ashamed" of having that illness. I have actually used this analogie to explain what depression is to people who couldn't understand it, and it really helps them. Shame comes from thinking that you have control of something, but are not using that control. We did not 'get' depression on purpose, just like no one 'gets' Diabetes on purpose. Both are OUT of anyone's control!
Now, here's something that's probably just going to frustrate you, but maybe it will help:
I read a lot of magazines(one of my obsessions) and I KNOW I've read an article about a woman experiencing the same kind of facial pain you are. And in the article it turned out that there was some kind of obscure cause or disease or something, and there was a definite 'treatment' for it. Unfortuneately, I cannot remember anything else about the article. But, I wanted to post this in case you might want to try to do some research on "facial pain" on your own. Good luck! love CarolAnn
Posted by mark on August 2, 2000, at 11:43:23
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression » ksvt, posted by CarolAnn on August 2, 2000, at 8:39:04
I can totally relate to how you feel ksvt. I can really beat myself up
with the "I should snap out of it, just get over it, blahblahblah" rap
that we've all done. Unlike me you're reaching out and trying to get
the help that you need. It took me years to get to the point where I
asked for the help I needed that finally pointed to the depression. It's
weird the ways your body tells you something is wrong. Mine started out
with terrible back-aches/spasms. I guess it was my brains way of saying,
"ok, if you won't listen to me maybe a knife between you're shoulder blades
will get you to a doctor".It's easy to tell you not to feel shame. But just remember; it doesn't matter
who you are or what you are - you're alright with me.
Posted by ksvt on August 2, 2000, at 12:00:59
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression, posted by Cindy W on August 1, 2000, at 22:23:17
> > I can relate. I try to talk about it as little as possible, and when I do I am usually thinking, ' who the hell is this nut I'm talking about?' I hate that feeling of being out-there, vunerable loose in the system.
> >
> > I only talk about it to my psychiatrist and here at PB, but there certainly have been times in my life where I've had to talk about it in places where I didn't want to, to people I didn't want to share it with.
> >
> > the worst time to have to do this is when you are actually suffering from the illness, and feeling extremely vunerable. I'm sorry you had to experience this today. It always took me a few days to recover from this kind of stuff.
> >
> > I've made a policy for myself to talk about it as little as possible. I don't tell anyone except when I absolutely must - like your situation today. Sorry again.
> >
> > Janice
> >
> > ps you have no reason to feel depressed, I have no reason to feel good (but I do). It's not your fault, it's not my fault.
> ksvt, I can relate, too. I feel especially ashamed today, because I just can't take any action to change the things I need to change in my life. It's hard enough to get out of bed in the morning, go to work, and make it through the day. After work, I do a few errands, feed my pets, and lie in bed trying to sleep (with varying success). I feel so ashamed that I'm not all better yet, after taking Effexor-XR and working with a pdoc for almost a year. Today was the first time in a long time I thought about suicide, too, although I won't do it. Hang in there and I'll try to do the same!Cindy - I feel badly I didn't respond to you a little more directly, as you did to me. I hope things are looking a little better today. You raised an issue about how long it's been for you. I worry about this all the time, but I worried alot more about it for the first year or so after i was diagnosed with major depression (for the 2nd time at least). It does none of us any good to set timetables on recovery. I try to remind myself, not always very successfully, that it took me a long time to develop depression and that it's not going to go away overnight. Hopefully you'll come to feel, most of the time anyway, that there's alot of ways to accommodate your life to depression so that you can tolerate the fact that it may always be there in some form. This is easier said than done but its worth working towards. Thanks again ksvt
Posted by Barbara Malm on August 2, 2000, at 18:36:25
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
> I saw a neurologist today. I've been having intermittent and at times very acute episodes of pain to one side of my face since Dec. In search of an explanation, I've been to an internist, an EMT guy, an allergist, been treated with 2 different courses of antibiotics and had 2 different CT scans all to pretty much no avail. The neurologist was the EMT guy's idea, but the neurologist couldn't figure out much either (he thought it was a sinus problem altho that avenue has been explored pretty thoroughly). The upshot was that he decided I should just be treated for facial pain of undetermined origin which, he claimed was not an unusual by product of depression. (news to me) He's prescribed small doses of elavil which, I guess is supposed to increase my pain threshhold. When I realized that he was pretty stumped I found myself pushing the idea myself that it was all stress/depression related, which is sort of my answer to everything. I despise having to relate my medical mental health history, and this time was no exception. I just came away from this appointment unbelievably depressed - that I had to let one other person know about my depression, that this sould bother me at all, that there are so many physical conditions that are too readily passed off as depression related, that I'm going to start taking another med which will do nothing to address a root cause, that all this is happening at a time when I was in the process of switching some meds and has disrupted plans somewhat, that because of this the neurologist had to talk with my pdoc, that both of them were questioned by my pharmacist who was curious about these prescriptions being called in in such a short period of time, and most of all, that I'm dealing with everything so miserably. I'm sure this sounds pretty rambling. The neurologist's office is in a hospital. I could see tons of people all around me dealing with really horrible stuff, so I feel like I have no reason to be depressed - but I get worn down by thinking of myself as a person with a disease (particularly one that shames me so much that I hate talking about it even to doctors) I make myself feel like I'm wearing a scarlett letter or something. This post probably seems pretty incoherent (and feels very inconsequential) but I hoped it would distract me from lying aroung thinking about hurting myself, which is pretty much what I've been doing. It doesn't require a response.
None of wants to appear abnormal. Even if we could define "normal", or find a "normal" person, we don't want to be abnormal. I have been experiencing quite crippling back pain for some time. I decided that my family doctor had had enough opportunities to figure out and address this problem, and that I had given him my last shot at it. So being 53 with a family history of arthritis, I see a rheumatologist. He gives me Xioxx. No relief. What a surprise. So when I could no longer stand up straight, I went to the emergency room where a neurosurgeon saw me - one MRI and three weeks of Percocet (does this stuff cime in six packs) later, he says I have scoliosis and a herniated disk. Much as I would have like to try, I could not live on Percocet. So remembering so many postings here at Psychobabble about Celexa, I came here to refresh my memory. I had tried Celexa last winter for a pretty bad bout of depression. No matter how bad the depression was, the side effects of the Celexa were worse. But several people mentioned that they had tried cutting on Celexa in half and that had minimized or eliminated the side effect problem. So having nothing to lose, I cut a Celexa in half each morning and in about two weeks, not only did my depression improve but my back ache disappeared and has never returned. And I push the envelope on these old back muscles. So I proved a couple of things: 1. the relationship between pain and depression (you all knew it but I am new at it); 2. the value of the postings at this site. Additionally, I want to add that I had allowed myself to become totally exhausted - physically, mentally and emotionally - "restorative" sleep had become a happy memory - this probably more than anything else contributed to the depression and the pain - so when all else fails, we have to take care of ourselves in every way - even the simplest.
Posted by tdaneen on August 4, 2000, at 15:24:59
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
I grew up, and have continued to live in a small town. Population under 7000. I have been in and out of therapy for depression (turned out to be bipolar disorder) ever since I was 18, I will be 32 this year. I owned a small business and worked very very hard to keep my uneven moods from my customers, their families, and the general public.
This caused a lot of anexity. No matter where I went, to get gas for the car, to get groceries, I felt like I had to keep it together because everyone knew me. When you are suffering from a disease like depression trying to be "ON" all the really stinks. I ended up going out of town for treatment.I hope you have at least a couple of people you do trust to share these feelings with. It is hard to carry this around by yourself, adding the cronic pain, that makes you have to work even harder. You are very strong for reaching out like this.
I want to encourage you. There will still be ups and downs, but as long as you have a support system you have a hand hold. Take care of yourself. Follow up with your doctors.
My TMJ and I are wishing your facial pain away in the speediest way possible :^)
Posted by ksvt on August 4, 2000, at 22:06:21
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression » ksvt, posted by tdaneen on August 4, 2000, at 15:24:59
> I grew up, and have continued to live in a small town. Population under 7000. I have been in and out of therapy for depression (turned out to be bipolar disorder) ever since I was 18, I will be 32 this year. I owned a small business and worked very very hard to keep my uneven moods from my customers, their families, and the general public.
> This caused a lot of anexity. No matter where I went, to get gas for the car, to get groceries, I felt like I had to keep it together because everyone knew me. When you are suffering from a disease like depression trying to be "ON" all the really stinks. I ended up going out of town for treatment.
>
> I hope you have at least a couple of people you do trust to share these feelings with. It is hard to carry this around by yourself, adding the cronic pain, that makes you have to work even harder. You are very strong for reaching out like this.
> I want to encourage you. There will still be ups and downs, but as long as you have a support system you have a hand hold. Take care of yourself. Follow up with your doctors.
> My TMJ and I are wishing your facial pain away in the speediest way possible :^)tdaneen - thanks much. I think as time goes on, I am finding some ways, altho very indirect, to let some people know when I'm feeling particularly bad. It is tough when you don't open up very easily, and for me it's hard because I really wouldn't want anyone to know how extreme my thinking can be. It's pretty amazing to me that I can be engaged in a perfectly harmless and inocuous activity, like watching a school performance, or sitting in a meeting, with suicidal images racing through my head. These are not exactly the kinds of things you want to share. You're right tho - it does get to be an pretty insufferable load to carry around. ksvt
Posted by shar on August 5, 2000, at 0:53:34
In reply to feeling ashamed of depression, posted by ksvt on August 1, 2000, at 19:47:16
I wanted to let you know about a site that talks about facial pain from a dental perspective. The dentist covers a number of "diseases" that get misdiagnosed as TMJ, and even has illustrations about where the pain occurs in the different "diseases".
I thought is was excellent.
www.drshankland.comGood luck!
Shar
Posted by Noa on August 9, 2000, at 12:02:25
In reply to Re: feeling ashamed of depression, posted by Barbara Malm on August 2, 2000, at 18:36:25
I can relate, too. Sometimes I feel like my health problems are seen by my doctor through a veil of the awareness of my depression, and taken less seriously because of it.
Don't let this discourage you from continuing to seek answers to your pain. Even if you take a "break" from the search for answers, for a while. Just because the docs don't know doesn't mean there isn't a reason. And suspecting that depression is the cause of the pain is just as much speculation as any other speculation and should not be considered the final answer.
I was having the hardest time figuring out what was wrong with me, with worsening and increasingly treatment-resistant depression, fatigue, swelling, brain fog, etc., until I found out it was hypothyroid. Treating it has helped tremendously, tho it is not a panacea for all my problems.
What about seeing an immunologist? Have you ruled out fibromyalgia? Or another auto-immune disorder? Have you seen an orthopedic specialist who specializes in the jaw, neck, shoulders, etc? I don't know, just some ideas.
This is the end of the thread.
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