Posted by alexandra_k on July 15, 2009, at 0:29:25
In reply to Re: hospitals round the world » alexandra_k, posted by twinleaf on July 2, 2009, at 16:22:11
Thanks. I'm not quite sure what to say... I feel... Embarrassed, I guess.
I am continuing to work with my t. It was touch and go there for a while... Being in hospital for a time really helped me. Got back into my work in hospital (couldn't work prior). Then got back into my work at work with leave. Now... Well... Conferences ever since, really. Halfway through the second one now... Halfway through the whole conference thing. Exhausted. Pretty full on going from hospital to that. Kind of looking forward to getting back home now.
A huge part of it... Was having some (kind of limited admittedly) contact with the p-docs in hospital. Some sense of something approximating 'options' for therapy. My p-doc was apologetic to me about what happened... But words words more words lose any sense of meaning at times (like Bob's apologies don't at all seem related to behavior change which isn't really an apology at all as I learned in DBT). So... Hard to know. But then he wrote 'professional courtesy' emails to the docs in hospital to say that he would see me at such and such a date at such and such a time. That he had seen me. That he was there basically. A promise to me doesn't mean a great deal with the whole breakdown in trust thing. A promise to them - a professional courtesy promise - meant something, however.
So... He is there. Only once a week. But he is there. And I will cope, I guess. That seems manageable now.
I'm exhausted and I kinda want to go home.
I don't quite fit in here. Philosophy... Starting to think this isn't quite my bag. So hard... My interests aren't mainstream is the problem. And... The 'smartest minds' don't have those interests. And those who are interested in my area typically don't have the 'smartest minds'. Hard... I'm kinda marginalizing myself given my interests. I'm not at home yet.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:902889
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20090424/msgs/906810.html