Posted by susan47 on July 10, 2008, at 18:14:59
In reply to Re: Poem for the weary » Toph, posted by susan47 on July 10, 2008, at 17:58:19
I am so f*ck*d, so f*ck*d am I, my mind cannot simply CANNOT feel f*ck*ng good unless it's Ohhhh so triggered, so triggered by a substance and I HATE that .. what about that synthetic cocaine, "Warning: Psychiatry Can Be Hazardous to Your Mental Health" ... what about if I've never even had the opportunity to try that, a real script med, because the doctors would rather see me fry myself into oblivion with the f*ck*ng dope, than be honest about it, and say "We don't know why anything works, we're sold a bill of goods by the pharmaceuticals, who pretty much run the world, baby, as you and I know it here in the "First World" .. hah. First World, my *ss. I'm a doctor who comes to you without knowing everything, I come to you and I know you are my patient, and perhaps you've read a f*ck*ng thing or two, baby, and perhaps you know about Therapy, and why it isn't given the way it should be, why psychiatrists are sold a f*ck*ng bill of goods by educators who are also bought by the big pharmaceuticals, and oh by the way, when my wife had our child we got free formula for years ... because N*s*l*e, or *%% (substitute the name of any company selling baby formula, honey, it doesn't matter.... does it?) wants to sell a lot of baby formula, or canned milk, oh yes, canned milk was good before we knew anything else... and I get free samples of all kinds of drugs, honey ... but education, I'm a little short on my reading in the field of mental health, lately, because I'm too busy with my own life, thank you very much, I have to have a life as well, and if I pass you onto this psychiatrist now, who will see you once a month for half an hour or so, and make sure you're taking the meds he prescribes you (oh and by the way his psychiatry does NOT consist of therapy beyond a simple question and answer session ... you f*ck*ng *ssh*l*, how I despise what you do to yourself and your patients .. I've seen you on the street, Dr. X, and I see how you look like a deer in the f*ck*ng headlights, there on the street, scared f*ck*ng sh*tl*ss of your own death you counsel others into mental agony as well, not away from it. You cannot get away from your own mental agony enough to see Happiness other than in your f*ck*ng paycheque, your $$ and your boat tell you more about your standing in the world than your own heart. Your own humanity has gone unfathomed and so you prescribe me a little f*ck*ng beige and green pill, and this, THIS is the answer to my prayers. And you had the gall to tell me you were more concerned about my marihuana smoking than any alcohol consumption I might have. You prescribe pills yet your are ignorant of drugs, and their effect, their real and true effect, on the soul of your "patient"."
Gut you will never hear those words from any GP, nor because they are trained to have a well-balanced life, one that does not include disease and disorder through unhappiness.
Self-fulfillment.
Did I happen to mention that Prozac acts like an AM-F*CK*NG-PHETAMINE on the brain???? Did I mention that my sweet, lovely little oh-so-harmless GP Dr. R had me up to 80 mg daily, knowing, f*ck*ng KNOWING that I was smoking mj .. but it was the way to keep me from killing myself .. but she should have known, and she either did not, so truly Ignorant ... or didn't care enough to know the truth, to read enough books, to open her mind enough to encompass another reality FOR THE GOOD OF HER PATIENTS ... for the good of me.
I wasn't worth it.
But I am.
I am worth it.
I am.
poster:susan47
thread:468123
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20080605/msgs/839170.html