Posted by susan47 on May 1, 2008, at 18:31:30
In reply to AAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, posted by susan47 on April 30, 2008, at 19:36:59
If I had known about this I would never have been able to make it through .. that was borrowed just now from Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (how do you put umlauts over the u's?) (Not that anyone will answer, not that anyone ever does) but Dear Ex-Therapist, dear ex-physician to me, dear person I imagined myself to love, if only I had been able to love the dear ex-h that way, perhaps things would have been different ..
but if I had known the pain of Now, back then when I fell "in love with you" ... in love .. if I had known this, perhaps I wouldn't have made the same choices. But then, perhaps, if life is meant to make me grow, if what Life asks of me is bigger than my courage, perhaps my courage can grow into this. Perhaps I can grow into the space vacated by courage when I fell in Hopeless love, into hopeless, hope-less love, knowing the outcome would be this and none other, perhaps my life might have been different.
Last night, I attended a concert of Mozart, Beethoven, Salieri, with a philharmonic choir and I really was alive, those were Life Moments, and the concert was over so quickly, but I was transported in those magical moments, the ride on waves of infinite, beautiful sound, were so Healing, so very, very healing.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
"I now discover how wonderful I am. I choose to love and enjoy myself.
I now discover how wonderful I am. I choose to love and enjoy myself.
I now discover how wonderful I am. I choose to love and enjoy myself."
poster:susan47
thread:820009
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20071223/msgs/826664.html