Posted by Susan47 on October 6, 2005, at 3:49:06
In reply to Glad you heard from them » Susan47, posted by Damos on October 3, 2005, at 18:49:00
I've spoken to them all twice in the last 48 hrs. They're in Paris, dirty, smelly old Paris. They called yesterday from the train station in London, they took the Chunnel. My littlest is over his stomach problems, for now, but isn't it funny how someone can be on the other side of the world, and you're talking to them as though they were just across town??? Amazing, really. I wish I were there though, to defuse Dad's temper, to make him more patient, coddle him along, as it were. That was always my task when I was there. To bring him back into a decent humour, one that was bearable for the children. My little girl takes it all on herself, now. It's so bloody sad, I can't talk about this anymore it hurts too much. And I am much less than a perfect parent in any case. I was a bad example, I allowed my kids too much access to my personal pain. And my daughter took some of that on herself, as well. She's a little girl who's going to need a great deal of TLC when she gets back. I have her in art therapy, both of them, actually and when they get back they're going to go regularly. I don't miss them the way I thought I would. I thought my heart would break, I thought I would be adrift in bad feeling, and I'm not, nothing could be further from the truth, I'm actually, and I'm a bit ashamed to say this, but I'm actually a bit relieved to have this freedom to just BE.
Forgive me.
poster:Susan47
thread:559423
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20050910/msgs/563596.html