Posted by Karen_kay on February 5, 2004, at 23:36:14
In reply to Re: no title, posted by Jai Narayan on February 4, 2004, at 20:01:07
penny hun, it may be wrong of me to say this, but do you think this may have something to do with your previous thread hun? Parents are our life source as children and we look to them for validation. As adults we sometimes still try to look to our parents for validation as well. Unfortunetely, parents aren't always the best the can be. I know, I didn't have the greatest parents in the world.
Your words hit me. And many others as well. They really made me realize that I need to stop trying to get validatin from my mom, who won't give it to me. And it hurts me deeply when she won't. I'm sorry your dad said that. But you need to know in your heart and in your spirit that just because he said the wrong thing doesn't make it true!
You know, I used to say to myself, over and over again, "How can I love myself if my own mother doesn't even love me?" And then I finally realized that people make mistakes and say the wrong things at the wrong times. They're just words. And I *know* they hurt, and they hurt deep, and they stay with you and scar. But you have to realize that you have to heal that scar. And love yourself for healing it. And know that your dad didn't want to hurt you. He just made a mistake, he didn't realize it woud hurt you this much.....Trust me, I'm learning how much my dad's mistakes hurt me too and learning to forgive him. And it's hard. But we can do it!
Your words really hit me! Thank y ou so much for them! I'm sorry if I rambled or said something wrong. But again, thank you...
poster:Karen_kay
thread:309399
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20040102/msgs/310039.html