Posted by yellowbrickroad on December 29, 2004, at 13:28:49
In reply to Checking in with my friends, posted by partlycloudy on November 28, 2004, at 7:27:49
When I got sober, I ran into much of the same attitude, and it was the main reason I left the program and wouldn't get near it for years without snarling and griping.
Recently, I've tried going back, and I wanted to attend meetings where nobody knew me because I didn't want the awkward conversations about the fact that I had started drinking again.
New meetings, new people. Wow...it has been a real eye opener to see just how different the people and the attitudes can be in the same town at different meetings! There are two women's meetings I really like that are in a part of town known for junkies (D.C. has a heroin problem like few other places, even among the rich kids), and the attitude there is that you do whatever it takes to stay sane and clean because your life is at stake.
I have also figured out that, at the "clubs" that house meetings all day, the quality of the meetings deteriorates as the day goes along. It's worth getting up for the 7 am meetings, which are full of people with jobs, lots of sobriety, and a generally positive outlook. By the time the 8:30 pm meetings roll around, it's full of heavy-preachers and skeezy men looking to score dates with the newcomer girls. Ew. At some meetings people talk about meds and psych problems, at some meetings people talk about that stuff only afterwards, and other meetings are avoided by those who value their therapy. There are also some dual-diagnosis meetings, but I haven't tried those yet.
My best friend (sober 8 1/2 years--I've known her almost that long) asks all her new sponsees if they are at least open to the prospect of therapy (not that it's a requirement).
So, it looks like it's a whole different scene depending on what meetings you can find. It took me years to figure this out, and then I lucked into some good meetings. Since then, I've been more willing to travel around and try the early meetings...and ask any kindred spirits I find what other meetings they recommend and give those a try.
YBR
poster:yellowbrickroad
thread:421215
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20041128/msgs/435336.html